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“The pleasure is all mine, Katya. But I can’t say that I have heard too much about you. Tell me, how did you two meet? Oh, I know, never mind. I am so stupid; you must be from the same agency as the last one. Although, I must say, you’re a lot prettier than she was.”
Damn it, Chase, For God’s sake!
“Do you have a card?” he asked. “I was thinking about maybe reaching out and hiring my own date for the next one of these?”
Looking at me with a confused frown, Katya searched my face for an answer to his question. I stumbled. I didn’t know what to say and it wasn’t really a conversation I wanted to have at the gala, so like the colossal dumbass I am, I said, “No Chase, you don’t understand. She’s not—I mean—she’s—she’s my babysitter.”
For some reason, I didn’t think Chase believed me but he didn’t press me on it so I downed my drink and changed the subject.
I knew I screwed up but didn’t know how to make it right so I carried on as if everything was fine. Of course, it wasn’t. The hurt and confusion I saw in Katya’s eyes was something I never wanted to see again and what was worse, I caused it. Just like last time.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Katya
I wasn’t sure what to make of Chase’s question or Zane’s comment about me being the ‘babysitter’ but I didn’t want to cause a scene. I knew this wasn’t the appropriate place for that discussion so I decided I would wait until we left to bring it up.
Besides, I had more pressing things on my mind.
I’d been feeling a little sick the last couple mornings, and I had a sneaking suspicion that there was something I perhaps needed to talk to Zane about. It was just that—a suspicion—but I wanted to be cautious just in case. Try as I did that night to have a good time and forget about all my worries, I was distracted, and my mind kept wandering off.
I was only half paying attention to the conversation Zane was having with Chase, and when Zane said my name and snapped his fingers in front of my face a few minutes after we sat down, I realized I’d totally been zoning out.
“Hey,” he said. “Are you okay?”
“Wha—yeah! Yes! I’m fine. Sorry, I just got lost in thought.”
He was standing up and he had his hand outstretched. “Do you want to dance?”I smiled and placed my hand gingerly on top of his. He helped me to my feet and whisked me out onto the dance floor. It was the first time we had ever danced together and I never wanted to stop. Now that I could focus my mind on something concrete, like finding the rhythm and putting my feet where they needed to be, it was easy for me to stay present and have a good time.
We danced the night away until the band finally signaled it was the last song. Luckily, it was a slow one and I was more than ready to feel Zane’s body closer to mine. He held me as we swayed to Frank Sinatra’s “Just the Way You Look Tonight.” It was turning out to be a magical evening, but I couldn’t wait to get home. For the first time in my short life, everything was looking up.
The drive home was peaceful and we continued our conversation about the possibility of me and Luca moving in with him. I couldn’t help myself and began joking with him.
With a straight face and a very serious voice, I said, “So, this large house of yours… do you expect me to clean it?”
Zane was so rattled it took all of my restraint not to bust out laughing.
“What? No, absolutely not. I have a housekeeper for that. I would never ask, I mean I would never expect…”
Finally, I couldn’t contain myself and I lost it. Barely able to breathe, I assured him, “Zane, calm down, I was only kidding. I’m sorry it flustered you.”
Calming down from his panic, he playfully grabbed my leg, grinned, and said, “I’m so going to get you back for that.”
We spent the rest of the drive talking about his house, and I finally got the courage to ask him why he hadn’t been staying there. I knew it wasn’t technically my business but seeing as we were sleeping together and he did ask me to move in, I thought I had a right to know.
Taking his hand, I gently said, “Zane, I don’t want to pry and I know we haven’t known each other long, but before I agree to move in with you, even temporarily, I need to know why you moved out of that house in the first place.” Sighing, he looked at me, lifted my hand, kissed it, and began talking. “Because of Sarah.”
Hearing another woman’s name come out of his mouth made my stomach twist up into knots. I assumed Sarah was Kenlee’s mom, and I’d been waiting for Zane to tell me more about her for a while now, but I hadn’t been prepared to feel such immediate and strong jealousy toward her.
It was childish, and I did my best to push those feelings aside before saying, “Tell me about her.”
“She died six months ago,” Zane said. “And after the accident, everything about that house reminded me of her and it was just too much. It was driving me crazy, so thankfully Harry told me I could move into the lodge for a while. That’s why Kenlee and I have been staying there.”
I looked down at my hands and felt ashamed for having let my jealousy rear its ugly head, even for a single second. “You were married?” I asked, hoping he would be able to tell from my tone of voice that I wasn’t angry or envious. Only curious.
He nodded. “Yes. She was beautiful and funny, and I was very much in love with her. We thought we had our whole lives to be together, but then she was taken away from me… from us… in the blink of an eye.” He paused as we came to a stop at a red light. “Kenlee wasn’t even a month old.”
“Oh my god, Zane.” I gasped and put my hand on his leg to reassure him. “That must’ve been awful. Having to take care of a newborn baby all on your ownwhilegrieving the death of your wife…” I shook my head. “I can’t even imagine.”
