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What the heck did we get ourselves into?
“Mom! Pancakes!” Henry squeals, interrupting this awful moment and stealing everyone’s attention.
Kiddo is getting extra pancakes today.
Henry rushes toward the booth, sliding down to the wall, and Shirley already has a high chair ready to go for Addy when Tricia sits down next to him.
“Hi, sweetie,” my mom says, giving me a peck on the cheek before moving her attention to Rex and giving him a wholesome smile. “Good morning, Rex.”
“Morning, Mrs. Adams,” he says with a grin before gesturing to his booth. “You guys are more than welcome to join me.”
“You’re so sweet,” she replies. “We have a handful over there that might be too noisy for you this early in the morning. I can’t promise that you wouldn’t be wearing Henry’s pancakes by the end of the meal.”
Rex chuckles.
“Be over in a minute to take your order,” I rush out to her before this gets weirder.
“Perfect, honey.”
“Holy shit,” I hiss to Rex as soon as she’s out of earshot. “We need a plan,pronto, to break up this relationship.”
Rex taps his fingers against the table. “We should’ve thought about the post-wedding aftermath.”
I squeeze into the seat across from him and lean in closer, lowering my voice. “It’s simple. You broke up with me.”
He rests his elbows on the table. “The fuck it is. I’m not being the bad guy in this fake breakup.You”—he points at me—“broke up with”—he thrusts his thumb toward him—“me.”
“Fine,” I groan, throwing my hands up while he relaxes back against the booth and grabs his coffee. “I’ll say it’s because you couldn’t sexually please me. I can work with that.”
He tilts his mug toward me. “Yeah, go tell your preacher father that I couldn’t sexually please you. No one in this town will believe you.”
I scoff. “Why?” I do a sweeping gesture of the diner. “Because all the women here know what it feels like to be sexually pleased by you since you’ve slept with everyone in this town with a vagina?”
“Nope.” He takes a loud sip of his coffee. “I haven’t slept with Candy or Shirley—”
I cut him off. “Really?”
“What? You insinuated I’ve slept with all the women in town. I haven’t slept with your sister—”
I interrupt again, “Thank God for that.”
“Or your mother.”
I snatch the knife from his side of the table. “I’m going to stab you and get fired from this job.”
He stretches his arms along the booth. “There isn’t one person in here who I’ve slept with.” He pauses and lifts a finger. “Well, except for you.” He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “I’ve also never shared a shower with any of them.” He does the same motion as before. “Except for you.”
I cross my arms, heat creeping up my cheeks.Oh no. He’s not bringing this up for the first time here.“Oh, you mean the shower where you were too wimpy to get naked?”
“Not a wimp. I was the only smart one in that shower,” he says, his voice thick.
“Wimp,” I snap back.
His dark brows furrow. “Drunk ass.”
I jump up from my seat. “I need to get back to work. I’ll be sure to spit on your waffles.”
He licks his lips. “I love your spit.”
