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“I mean that I can see some underlining stress behind your eyes. Maybe, even a little sadness.”
Her words took me aback.Was I that obvious?
“Well…” I paused and tried to search for a way to lighten up—and redirect—the conversation. “It has been a crazy week with all the power outages and Thatch and Jude blowing up canoes.”
“That’s true.” She grinned. “But I think, deep down, you know that’s not what I’m talking about.”
Instantly, a visual of the negative pregnancy test I took before coming out to the lake house filled my mind.
Man, leave it to Aunt Paula to always know when you had something else on your mind. It was like she had a direct line to other people’s subconscious.
Just talk to her about it…
“I guess I am a little bummed and confused about something.”
Her gentle eyes examined mine, but her lips stayed closed as she patiently waited for me to find the words to explain what I’d been feeling.
It took a long minute, but eventually, I found a semblance of the words to express what I’d been going through.
“Wes and I have been having unprotected sex for the past year, and…I’m not pregnant.”
“Are you two trying to have a baby?”
“Not necessarily.” I shrugged one shoulder. “We’re just going with the mind-set that whatever is supposed to happen will happen.”
“But I take it there’s a little disappointment because nothing has happened?”
I nodded.
“You know, when your uncle Brad and I got married, we tried to have kids,” she started to explain. “But it just wasn’t in the cards for us.”
“I’m kind of feeling like that’s how it is for me,” I answered honestly and stared down at my hands. “I mean, I know that I had Lexi, but I just have this nagging feeling that I can’t have any more kids. And I guess I’m starting to worry that maybe Wes will be missing out on a fulfilling life by never getting a chance to have kids of his own.”
There it was. The full truth and my biggest fear. Once the words left my lips, I felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. But I also felt anxiety as I waited for her to respond.
“Have you told Wes all of this?”
“Some, but not all.”
Aunt Paula snuggled closer, wrapping her hand around my knee and squeezing kindly.
“Your uncle Brad and I have had a very fulfilling life, and we didn’t have any kids.” She moved her hand from my leg to lace our fingers together, giving me a soft pulse of pressure, and I looked up to meet her eyes. “You know what I think you should do?”
“What?”
“I think you need to tell Wes how you’re really feeling.” Her voice was gentle and oh-so understanding. “He’s a good man, a kind man, and he loves and adores both you and Lexi something fierce.”
“But what if he realizes he actually wants to have kids of his own?”
“That’s always a possibility, but Winnie, I don’t think you realize how much you’ve given that man.” Her mouth quirked up into a loving smile. “He went from a single, broody guy to a man with a family. A man with true purpose. A man with a wife and a daughter who need and love him. And that’s exactly why, deep down in my heart, I know that Wes Lancaster has everything he wants with you.”
“You think so?”
She nodded. “Sweetheart, I’m so sure of it, I’d even take a bet with Jude over it.”
That made me laugh, and I reached out to hug my aunt with both arms. “Love you.”
“Love you too, Winnie.” She patted my back. “Now, let’s go out on the deck and find out if those handsome firefighters enjoyed the chocolate chip cookies I made them.”
