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“Good. Then let’s go upstairs. Because my grandmother expects us to join her for lunch, and I want you all to myself for a while before that.”
Beck said he’d upgraded to a suite, but he hadn’t mentioned it was the Presidential Suite. Our room was the entire top floor of the hotel. It had floor-to-ceiling views of the mountain range, a grand piano, a dining room table that could seat at least a dozen, and an internal elevator to get to the second-floor master bedroom.
“Holy crap.” I walked over to the windows. “I don’t think I want to know what this room costs.”
Beck came up behind me. He pushed my hair to one side and kissed my shoulder. “It doesn’t matter. You’re worth it.”
I turned and wrapped my arms around his neck. “Thank you. And I don’t mean for dropping everything and coming to the hospital, or for splurging for this insane room. I mean for being you and somehow always sensing when to push and when to pull back.”
Beck trailed his hands up and down my spine. “Come on. Let’s get you upstairs and into bed for an hour or two before lunch. The doctor said you need rest.”
I lifted a brow. “Rest isn’t what normally happens when we’re in a bed together.”
“Trust me.” He groaned. “It’s not going to be easy.”
But even getting dressed and leaving the hospital to come to this posh room had drained me. Beck wrapped his arms around me and held me so tight, it felt like I didn’t have a care in the world. Or maybe I did, but he would hold them while I took a break from everything. I drifted off to dreamland almost immediately. When I awoke, Beck wasn’t next to me anymore. I heard him talking somewhere off in the distance and pushed up onto my elbows to listen.
“Alright, great. And reach out to Phillip Matthews. He’s the CEO of Sloan Kettering. His daughter owns a medical supply company. Her father was one of the investors. I helped her gobble up her two biggest competitors a few years back. Her father is a good guy. He was appreciative of all the work we did and told me if I ever needed anything not to hesitate to call. I need to cash that chip in now. See if you can set me up with a call, and I’ll take it from there.”
It was quiet for a moment, then…
“I’m still working on when I can get her back. I’ll keep in touch. And nice work getting a consult with that doctor from the UK. I look forward to speaking with him tomorrow.”
I closed my eyes. I should’ve known Beck wouldn’t give up easily. He was too determined a person to accept that he couldn’t find a way to fix me. I’d lulled myself into believing he accepted that I didn’t want any more treatment, because then I wouldn’t have to go back to pushing him away. But he never would accept it. I laid back and stared up at the ceiling.
I’d thought letting go of my hopes and dreams for a future was the hardest thing I’d ever had to do. But letting go of Beck might be harder. Tears prickled my eyes, and my chest felt heavy.
Beck came back to the bedroom ten minutes later. He had no shirt on, and it was painful to think I wouldn’t be able to run my fingers along the peaks and valleys of his eight-pack anymore.
He smiled. “You’re awake. How you feeling, sleepyhead?”
I stretched my arms over my head, pretending I hadn’t overheard his conversation. “Good. Where were you?”
“Had some work calls to take care of.”
I forced a smile. “Oh. Alright. What time is lunch with Louise?”
“I told her I’d text her when you were ready.”
“Okay.” I pushed the covers off. “I’m going to take a shower.”
“Want company?”
I shook my head. “Not today.”
The smile slipped from Beck’s face, but he took it in stride. “Leave the door open a little so I can hear if you need anything, okay?”
“Thanks.”
I started mourning Beck’s loss in the shower, before I’d even formulated a plan to lose him. A profound feeling of emptiness struck as the hot water sluiced over my body. Tears clogged my throat, but I refused to let them pass, to let myself cry. I’d cried a river and then some. But more importantly, Beck had learned how to read me well. And I didn’t want to explain puffy eyes and a red face. So I somehow held it in.
Though Beck was more observant than ever. For a man who could take the wrong baby home from daycare and keep the wrong dog in his apartment for two days, he wasn’t missing a thing now.
“You okay?” he asked when I finally emerged from the bathroom almost an hour later. I’d dried my hair, but didn’t have the energy to put on makeup.
“Fine. Just tired. My battery drains much faster than normal, even after a good charge.”
“Well, that’s to be expected. Your body needs time to heal. I told Louise we’d meet her downstairs at the hotel restaurant at one. But we can order something up to the room for the three of us if you don’t feel up to leaving—or even cancel altogether.”
