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After a moment, she looked up. Her face was covered in blotches, and her bottom lip quivered.
My heart had been hanging on by a thread, and seeing how upset she was snapped my last bit of control.
“Fuck,” I grumbled and reached for her. “Come here.”
She didn’t even try to fight it. It was like a floodgate opened. Nora cried out, a horrible, gut-wrenching sob. Her hands fisted my robe, and she hid her face against my chest as her shoulders shook. I scooped her up and carried her into her room, taking a seat on the edge of the bed and cradling her on my lap as she cried.
“I’m not ready to lose her yet,” she choked out.
The broken sound of her voice shredded me. I tasted salt in my throat, and I was grateful for the lump that formed, because it was the only thing that kept me from losing it right along with her.
I stroked her hair. “It’s going to be okay.”
She sobbed louder. “It’snotgoing to be okay. The world is just going to keep on, and everything will be the same. And that is not okay.”
I held her tighter. “That’s not true. Everything won’t be the same. You know why? Because she’s not leaving the world the way she found it. Louise changed lives.” My voice broke. “She made you and me better people.”
I was trying to help, but what I said only made things worse. Nora cried harder. The sound came from a place deep within. I didn’t have too much experience giving comfort, except to my daughter, so I tried what worked best for her and rocked back and forth.
It seemed to help. Eventually Nora’s shoulders shook less, and her gasps for air became less frequent. After a while, she let out a big sigh. “Thank you.”
“Nothing to thank me for, sweetheart.” I kissed her forehead. “If anything, I should be thanking you. My grandmother is lucky to have someone who cares so much.”
She wiped her cheeks. “I think I’m going to raid the mini bar for wine and take a warm bath.”
I smiled. “That sounds like a plan.”
Nora crawled from my lap and stood. “Thanks, Beck. Your grandmother is lucky to have you, too.”
I nodded and got up. “I’ll leave the door open a crack in case you want to talk when you get out of the bath.”
“I think I’ll be okay. But I appreciate that.”
At least a half hour went by before I heard movement next door. The lamp in Nora’s room was on, and a sliver of light streamed in from the door that separated our rooms. There was a distant click, and then that sliver went dark. So I settled back into bed, giving in to the heavy weight of my eyelids. I started to drift off, but then I heard a creak.
“Beck?”
I lifted to my elbows. The curtains were drawn, but there was still enough light to see Nora’s silhouette. She was wearing the hotel robe, and her wet hair was slicked back like it had just been brushed.
“Are you okay?”
“No.” She paused. “I want to forget.”
I froze. Those were the words she’d used the first time we met, the night of her Tinder date. I was relatively sure I understood what she was saying, but I didn’t want any doubt at all. “What are you asking me, Nora?”
Her response was to untie her robe and slip it from her shoulders. “Make me forget, Beck.”
When I didn’t say anything, she took a few steps closer. She was completely naked, and since I didn’t have any clothes to change into, so was I.
“I only had one glass of wine,” she said. “And yes, I’m emotional. But I’m not so emotional that I’m making a rash decision. I’ve thought about you every night since the first night we met. I’ve touched myself remembering the sound of your deep voice and imagining my nails scraping your beautiful tan skin.”
Oh fuck.
She moved closer.
“Nora…you don’t want this. You’ve told me that yourself, multiple times.”
She smiled. “No, you’re wrong. I lied. I’ve told you I didn’t want you because I was trying to convince myself it was true. But I want you so badly, I couldn’t even force myself to be with a man. God knows I tried with that cowboy on the last night in Montana.”
