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“I’m leaving the firm,” I said confidently, even though I didn’t feel very confident about it at all.
Magda set her jaw, tilting her chin up. Looked like she was ready for a fight, but I wasn’t going to give it to her.
“This again? Why?”
I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck with one hand. “It’s just not working out. I’m going to open my own firm, hire some people, get off the ground.”
Magda looked away. “I wish you luck.”
I blinked. What, no fight? No pushing back like before? I felt like I had rocks in my stomach. This couldn’t be how it ended.
“Is that all you have to say to me?”
Magda looked at me and I realized for the first time that she looked tired, bags under her eyes like she hadn’t been sleeping.
“What else is there to say, Roarke?”
I set my jaw. “Nothing, I guess,” I muttered, and started to walk out, but I paused right at the doorway, shutting the door and the blinds.
“What are you doing?” Magda asked, but there was no hint of panic in her voice, just exhaustion.
“Kissing you goodbye,” I murmured, and Magda made a surprised sound in the back of her throat when I walked quickly toward her, grabbing her around the waist to pull her to me and leaning my head down to press my mouth against hers.
I couldn’t leave without a kiss, a good one, and I kissed her deep and thoroughly, my tongue sliding across hers, nipping her bottom lip when I pulled away. My heart ached knowing this would probably be the last time I saw her.
“Goodbye, Magda Riley,” I said softly, and Magda clutched onto my shirt, looking up at me with wet blue eyes.
“Roarke,” she whispered. “Wait.”
But it was too late. I was going to lose it, tell her everything, if I spoke now, and I had to get out of there.
I left immediately, going directly to the bathroom and splashing water on my face, looking at myself in the mirror.
What the hell was I doing? I was really giving up a chance at love, and for what? Because Magda was my best friend’s daughter? Because we worked together? Because she told me one little lie? Was this really worth all that?
What it all boiled down to was that I had three divorces worth of baggage and Magda was young and pretty. As much as it pained me, she could find someone better, someone with less damage. She deserved happiness, and I clearly couldn’t give that to her.
We hadto meet up one last time at the courthouse for the final hearing, and Magda was there early while I ran a few minutes late. I didn’t want to be there, didn’t want to see her.
She looked serious, her face blank, and she didn’t so much as glance at me as we worked. It was easy enough, just reading from the prenup to explain that Mrs. Martinez was entitled to her trust fund back.
We decided to change the ruling about custody one last time and try for full custody for Mrs. Martinez. Magda argued that as the children’s mother, she should have custody, and she argued passionately, but I could tell that her heart wasn’t in it. The way Sandra Martinez had acted at the last hearing meant that Magda wasn’t sure she did deserve custody of her children.
The judge, who had first ruled for shared custody, changed his ruling based on new evidence that turned up and the testimony of the children who told the court her mother brought younger men home all the time. So, primary custody was awarded to the father, and the judge told Sandra she had to pay alimony and child support. It definitely wasn’t what our client had wanted, and she cursed and stormed out of the courtroom.
However, we’d technically won the case. Magda packed up her things and I swallowed hard as she walked past me, hoping she would say something, hoping that she’d at least look at me.
The case was over. I was officially recommending her for partner and probably leaving the firm. It was final in a way that made my heart sink to my toes.
Magda didn’t say a word to me, just walked out of the courtroom.
It was for the best.
So why did it hurt so fucking much?
* * *
My brothers Liamand Elijah are both married and busy, and I know that. So when I text both of them, telling them I needed to talk and then falling asleep in my office chair, I didn’t expect to get a phone call from Liam.
