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“So this is about Peyton?” Kendall flashed him a sad, supportive little smile. “Pete told me you broke up.”
“No… yeah… maybe…” He leaned his elbow on the arm of the chair and wiped his face. “Not really. I mean yeah, what happened with her and me wanting to make things right started me down this thought process. But then I got to thinking about one of the girls at the center who was sexually assaulted by a group of boys from another school when she was drunk at an after party. They think because they’re athletes and rich the rules don’t apply to them. She was barely conscious for fucksakes.” He stood up and walked over to the window. “There’s this culture that guys. Athletes. Are above the law and it’s fucked up. The only way that it’ll change is if athletes make it change.”
“Have you talked to Peyton about this?”
“No, I mean yeah, she’s kind of the reason I’m wanting to do this, but I was a dick athlete too. I didn’t have all the details before I jumped right in, judging her for what happened. I’m no better than the other guys.”
“Oh my god, Ry, there is no comparison between you and someone like Andy. You would never do something like that.”
“No but, how many times have I looked the other way when my teammates cheated on their wives, or took drunk girls home from the bar to celebrate? We’ve all had a guy on the team who we wouldn’t let the women we cared about go near because we didn’t trust him, and yet we sat by because the team is the most important thing.” He rubbed the tension in the back of his neck and turned around to face his sister. “I feel like we need to do better as men, be better. Hold each other accountable for how we treat women because I don’t know, shouldn’t that be the standard we hold our teammates to and the kind of thing that truly puts the team first?”
Kendall got up from her desk and walked over to Ryan, and threw her arms around his neck. “You’re a good man, Ry.”
He squeezed her back and sank into her for a moment. “Thanks.”
Kendall pulled back. “I knew the pressure from dad growing up and coaches and teammates to win at all costs had left a mark on you, but I thought that’s why you were such a perfectionist. I didn’t know it affected you this way too.”
He pressed his tongue against his front teeth, then let out a breath. “I didn’t really think so either until I started thinking about the thing with Peyton and Andy.”
“You should talk to Peyton about this.”
“She’s not really interested in anything I have to say, and I don’t blame her.”
“Maybe you were just saying the wrong things before.” She squeezed his arm. “She’d want to hear this. You’re a good man, Ry. Yeah, you can be a jerk like anyone else, but at your core you’re a good person. Talk to her.”
He shook his head. “She deserves better than a guy like me.”
Kendall’s eyes filled with tears as she looked at him. “There’s no one better than you, big brother. You made a mistake. You aren’t perfect, no matter how hard you try to be. Show her this side of you. Be vulnerable.”
“Or I need to practice what I preach and listen to what she’s saying. She told me to fuck off, Ken, and leave her alone. I have to respect that as much as I don’t want to. This isn’t about me. I’m the one who hurt her. I don’t get to decide if or when she’ll forgive me.”
Kendall wiped the tears that leaked down her cheek. “This sucks. Are you still volunteering for your shifts with the kids?”
“I am. She never seems to be there when I come, so I think it’s pretty clear she’d rather not see me. I’m hoping with time she’ll change her mind, and we can talk, but until then, I have to respect her wishes.” His eyes burned with his own unshed tears, and he pinched the bridge of his nose. “So, about this program idea. Any thoughts?”
“Let me sit on it for a few days and see what I can come up with. We’re going to have to talk to Kirsty about it because you’ll want some guys on board and then extend it out to the league. But if we do the pitch properly, we should be able to come up with something that will ease your concerns. Possibly keeping it totally separate by creating your own non-profit. All proceeds go to sexual assault centers in each city or something.” Kendall’s pen flew across the notepad on her desk as she wrote ideas. Her hand zipped across the page in an effort to keep up with her brain.
Ryan smiled as he watched his sister work. He’d known coming to Kendall about this was the right decision. If anyone could figure out how to make this fly, it was her.
After several minutes, Kendall blinked at him like she hadn’t realized he was still in the room. “Sorry, I got in the zone. Give me a couple of days, and we’ll chat after you get back from this next road trip.”
“Sounds good.” He walked over to her desk and bent down and kissed the top of her head. “Thanks, sis. For listening and doing this.”
“Of course.”
As he walked toward the door, Kendall said, “What are you thinking for the name?”
“Do better, be better.”
Kendall smiled and nodded. “I like it. Good luck at the games.”
“Thanks,” he said as he walked out of her office. Now he just had to get his head on straight so he could actually play. Falling in love fucking sucked.
Chapter Twenty-One
Tuesday evening after a long day of work, Peyton kicked off her shoes and walked to the kitchen. She opened the fridge and pulled out a beer, cracked the top and took a long, slow pull. She was just about to take a second when the doorbell rang. Who the hell was that?
She padded across the floor, stopped at the front door, and peeked through the peephole. Shoot, why was Kendall here?
