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I felt lighter.
I felt freer.
I felt like the woman I might have been if I’d never met Owen Byrne.
I wasn’t that woman, but for small spaces of time, I felt her trying to emerge again. Maybe it was Thomas. Maybe it was all the sex wiping the fog from my mind. Maybe it was seeing my dream finally come true.
I could see the changes and improvements as they were, but more importantly, I could see them as they would be when opening night rolled around. The place would be filled with ballers of all stripes, from old ass corporate types to Silicon Valley youngsters, to gangsters and everything in between. I could see them mixing with the hottest girls in town, tossing fifties and hundreds onto the stage, stuffing them by the handful into G-strings.
But the best part, the part that would double the money we brought in, was that the top floor would be for frisky rich bitches who liked to watch hot young men thrust their cocks to the latest pop songs. It was all coming together nicely.
A laugh bubbled out of me as I stood on the top floor of the renovated building and watched the workers install a totally over-the-top blue steel chandelier with gold flowers. It held actual candles and was only meant to impress the rich women who would spend their money up here.
A hand went to my lower back, and I caught Thomas’ scent before he whispered in my ear. “What’s so funny?”
I turned to him, enjoying the comfort and heat of being so close to him and not worrying what anyone else thought.
“I was just thinking that most women my age would make something else their second chapter. Maybe start going to church or joining a yoga club, volunteering to spend time with broken kids, anything but tits and dicks.”
Thomas’ deep laugh rumbled against my chest. “It’s not too late to make that the name, is it? Pretty fucking catchy.”
“Tits & Dicks. Jasper would lose his shit. And he was right about expanding our current branding instead of starting over.”
“If anyone could change his mind, it’s you.” He took my hand and pressed our palms together, a clearly affectionate gesture that took me off guard.
I knew how Thomas felt about me, and I wished I could trust it and return his feelings, but I couldn’t. I’d wiped away that part of myself years ago, but still, I let him take my hand and gave his hand a squeeze.
A warmth settled around me, and I froze, wondering if this feeling, this warmth, was the thing Owen had truly stolen from me all those years ago. Or was it Colm who had taken what was left after Owen?
“Where are we going?”
Thomas looked at me with a gentle smile and brought our clasped hand to his mouth, brushing a light kiss over my knuckles. “You’ll see.”
I sighed. “I don’t have time for this.”
“You do,” he insisted and guided me down the winding wrought-iron staircase.
“You think you should be doing something else, but the fact is that you’re doing what those yoga, charity, and church types never could, hell never would even think about. You’re turning the Green Zone into a place where less fortunate people can live and thrive. They can be safe when they walk down the streets, when they let their kids play at the park. You’ve given a fucking lot, Sadie. Believe that.”
“That’s not all I’m doing.” I didn’t want him or anyone else looking at me like I was some sort of do-gooder. I wasn’t. This was a good plan that would make me a lot of money, give me more power and influence, and help me demolish any competition that wanted to come at me again.
“It doesn’t matter. We all have our reasons for doing the shit we do, and most of us don’t turn a whole fucking town around, Sadie Rose.”
We hit the bottom step, and Hulu, Evan, Mace and Provo fell into a diamond shape around us. Provo pushed the door open to the street, and the men’s formation shifted so that I was always protected. I reached for my sunglasses, and Thomas took them from me.
“What the fuck?”
“See this, Sadie. See it with clear eyes.”
“I can’t see shit with all this sun.”
He laughed and pocketed my sunglasses anyway.
“You see tits and dicks, but these people who live in the Green Zone, they see something else. They see hope.”
I wanted to say something sarcastic, but as we progressed down the street, I couldn’t find it in me to do it.
“See that liquor store over there? Your loan allowed him to put in cameras and hire a security guard so he can stay open later.”
