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Eric rushed to me, trying to get me to look into his eyes. I backed away and Caelan snarled, warning Eric not to touch me.
“Please, Flora. You don’t—”
I folded my arms and stared at the floor. “You’ve got one minute to convince me you’re anything but trash,Eric Herasckow.”
Eric’s arms flailed around, then he rushed to say, “Yes, my father is an evil, vindictive, murderous bastard and I was raised by monsters the same as you both were. Yes, I wanted to break you up, ruin your marriage, wreck everything… and had been waiting for the opportunity for a while, I admit. But I didn’t create what happened in Ukraine, it just happened, and I wasn’t expecting Caelan to fly out and scupper my plans. I never thought in a million years he’d actually leave you. But, anyway… I fell for you, I did. And he knows I love you and hates it.” Eric looked over his shoulder at Caelan. “Don’t I?”
Caelan only snarled and cursed the man.
Eric pleaded, looking like he was ready to take to his knees, “Give me one more night. One more. And I swear after that, I’ll go. You won’t see me again. One more night to say goodbye properly and you’ll never have to see me again.”
I lifted my eyes to look at Caelan, who didn’t look happy. Yet he didn’t deny me.
“One more night, to finish it, properly. You and me,” I said, because deep down, I needed some closure. I needed to know if any of it had been real or if my mind was playing tricks… or worse… he was an evil bastard, just like his father.
“Yes,” said Eric, relieved. “Yes.”
Caelan nodded his head. “Then he’s gone. From our lives. Forever.”
“We’re agreed?” I asked them.
“Yes,” they both said, at the same time.
“Okay.”
Chapter Thirty-One
We all ate dinner together that evening, a strange kind of awkward silence having descended. Then Caelan left the table, took a shower upstairs and came back down as we were finishing dessert. He wore his going-out clothes and had splashed on lots of cologne.
“What are your plans?” I tried not to show my fear. Guilt. Jealousy. I could feel Eric’s eyes on me, not on Caelan. On me.
“I’m meeting some guys for beers,” he said, “and probably winna be back until dawn.”
It wasn’t like Caelan to go out for beers, but he wasn’t exactly short on friends, either. I understood he wouldn’t want to be around for what we were about to do, however.
He grabbed his keys and checked he had his wallet and phone. Before he left he didn’t look at me, he just kissed the head of his son who was asleep in my arms.
“The sooner this is over, the better.”
Then he was gone.
Eric licked his lips and said softly, “You pop Logan to bed and freshen up. I’ll tidy everything down here.”
I nodded absently because everything seemed surreal and it felt like I wasn’t really doing this—but I was. Logan was nearly asleep having had follow-on milk for dinner. I was slowly weaning him off.
Upstairs Logan really didn’t complain much at all as I winded, changed and put him in bed. I sang to him for a few minutes and watched him after that, his puffy jowls so cute as he slept.
Which of those men would I choose as his father, I wondered. I wasn’t sure.
Caelan was Logan’s daddy but he had secrets, mysteries and strange foibles that lurked.
Eric wasn’t his father but he made me—Logan’s mother—feel safe.
Had I ever really felt safe with Caelan?
I’d felt protected, but safe was a different thing.
Safe was peace. And quiet. And calm. Caelan could never sit still. It wasn’t in his nature.
