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He turns and I see the same displeasure in his eyes that I saw last night when he met Kristen. “I hope you know what you’re doing, Bradford.” His voice is filled with the same disapproval. “Because from what I’m hearing, this marriage is causing more harm than good.”
“I know exactly what I’m doing.”
He lifts a brow. “Are you sure about that?”
“I’m more certain of Kristen than anything, Dad. You need to trust me. You also need to trust that Alan’s strategy will ensure my marriage doesn’t become a defining factor in my career.”
He considers me for a long moment before finally asking, “How long have you known Kristen?”
I know my father, so I know what he’s really saying isFucking tell me you didn’t just marry a woman you barely know.“Almost a decade.” I pause as his eyes flare with surprise, giving him a moment with this information. “I would have married her years ago if I’d had the chance.”
He doesn’t bother with any further questions about our relationship because that’s not his style. My father only concerns himself with facts that he considers relevant to whatever outcome he’s pursuing. He loves his family but at times he can come across as cold-blooded. Instead of pursuing that line of enquiry, he says, “I trust you, son, but I can’t help worrying that your heart is getting in the way now. You’ve wanted this career your entire life. I’d hate to watch you throw it away because you got swept up in this woman.”
My parents have never been swept up in each other as far as I’m aware, which means I’ve found something Dad can’t guide me in. He has no experience of a marriage that was entered into because of love, so I have no example to follow here. The person I’m closest to who has shown me what love can add to a life is Owen. He was willing to give up everything for Charlize and I’ve watched him change since she came into his life. Watched his happiness grow.
I want that kind of love. That kind of life.
“I understand your concern.” I do, even if I believe it’s unwarranted. “But let me get swept up, Dad. Let me choose happiness. My career will recover from the hit.”
His shoulders don’t relax, but he says, “I hope so.”
We’re interrupted by a phone call he receives. He speaks with his assistant for a couple of minutes, and when he comes back to me, I ask, “What’s the history between our family and Kristen’s? Her father has done everything he can to force her to divorce me because of that history.”
Dad scowls. It’s such an unusual expression for him that it surprises me. “William and I were friends in college but his competitive streak ended that friendship. He didn’t like the fact I was more successful than him.”
“That’s it?” That hardly seems enough of a history to cause the actions he’s taken to remove his daughter from his life.
The rigid set of Dad’s jaw tells me there’s more, but his expression relays reluctance to divulge it.
“Kristen is in the dark, Dad. Her parents refuse to tell her the reason for her father disinheriting her. Tell me what happened so I can help her make sense of what William is doing.”
I watch as he fights himself over this. Finally, he says, “This is between us, Bradford. You can share it with Kristen, but I would appreciate it if you ask her to keep it private.”
“Okay.”
“Kristen’s mother and I were also close in college. I thought it would go further than friendship but William cut in and pursued her with relentless determination. She and I drifted apart once my friendship with him ended, however I spent a night with her a year after Callan was born. I’m not proud of that fact and I never saw her again after that night. It seems that she told William.”
Fuck.
“Does Mom know?” I mentally calculate the timeline of our family, working out that he cheated on Mom in between them having Callan and Ethan who is the youngest.
He nods. “Yes. I told her a few weeks after it happened. She and I were having problems and she suspected another woman. Learning who it was almost destroyed her and I will always regret that.”
My brain is still putting together the timeline. “Is that why Mom was so low after Ethan was born?” She had post-natal depression that resulted in her withdrawing from us. I was six at the time and recall how everything changed in our life. It took her more than a year to recover. Her relationship with Ethan has always been difficult and distant, and I now wonder if this is the reason.
“Yes.”
I have never seen my father look the way he does right now. He’s clothed in remorse. For a man who can be merciless when he wants to be, and hard-nosed about many things in his life, this is a very different side to him.
“Just how stubborn is William Blaise?”
“He’s the kind of stubborn that doesn’t ever forgive, Bradford. I wish Kristen luck with changing his mind.”
35
Kristen
On a day that has been one of the worst days of my life, Bradford comes home from work wearing an expression that makes me think I may need strong liquor to survive the night. He appears troubled by something when he finds me in the kitchen just before seven p.m. and I’m pretty sure it’s only the disaster he walks in on that stops him from telling me what that trouble is.
