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Please, baby, don’t give me those eyes.
I can’t see them like this right now.
You know I have zero self-control when it comes to you.
I’ll ruin my fucking life for you, Anna.
I gave a nod.
And that’s when Anna let go.
She inched herself away from me.
Actually, she went across the room to her desk.
“It’s just everything right now,” she said. She started to pace. “My fucking landlord is a scumbag. Always threatening me. Wanting to charge me more. Finding reasons to do so. And I’m dumb enough to go along with it. Why? Why do I do that? Oh, it’s because I trust him. I trust everyone too much. That’s my problem. Oh, but all I’ve done is give him fuel. That’s right. Fuel to use against me! You believe that? So now he shows up and wants me out of here because he wants retail. He wantsfoot traffic.He just wants to charge more. A lot more. He’s a piece of shit. And he keeps messing with me. He wants me to do something so he can use it against me. I’m losing my mind over this!”
Anna kicked a chair.
It moved an inch.
She winced in pain.
She sucked in a breath.
“What else, Anna?” I asked.
“Oh, it gets so much fucking better,” she cried out. “My boyfriend…”
She froze and looked at me.
Those daggers in my heart suddenly twisted about eighty-five times.
My lip curled.
“I’m at my wits end with it all,” she said. “Between him and now you, I’m done with it all. It’s just too much. I’m tired of trying to impress everyone. And for what? It’s not like Steven can even get hard for me!”
Holy. Shit.
I almost told her to stop right there.
But she was letting loose.
“That’s right. I finally said it in the open. He can’t get hard for me. And it’s just for me. I thought it was a thing. A condition. Something medical. And even then, what did I do? I went with it. I didn’t say a word about it. I didn’t want him to feel bad about himself. Oh, how stupid of me. I only then find out he’s out with strippers. And he’s hard as…” Anna grabbed a lamp off another end table and shook it. “Hard as this fucking lamp!”
The light bulb called it quits and turned off.
She slammed the lamp down and put her hands to the table.
“He gets hard for other women. Women he pays. As though that’s okay. And what do I do? Nothing. I just keep thinking it all over. I end up sleeping in. I end up messing up my schedule. I end up finding Steven in the shower, masturbating to some video of a woman telling him how big and hard he is. And then I show up here and I fuck up the entire day. I fucked up your day.”
Anna looked at me.
“And I’m sorry, Joe,” she said. “I don’t have you in my main schedule for this office. I have you in an outside schedule. Why? I don’t know. It’s stupid of me to do it that way. In the confusion of everything, I mixed up my days. And I left you sitting there alone. Left you with all your thoughts and then you show up here…”
“I’m a fucking asshole, Anna,” I said. “For the way I showed up here.”
“You had every right to do so.”
