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“I’m ready for my meal now,” Leo said as soon as we walked into the bedroom. “Undress for me.”
I raised my eyebrows in his direction. “Only if you tie me up.”
Leo shook his head and motioned me over to where he sat down on the bed. “Let’s talk.”
“Ugh, never mind.”
“No, come here. I want to explain to you my concerns about bringing you into all this too soon.”
Defeated, I moved toward him and crawled up onto the bed, only for him to pull me into his arms. “It’s not too soon.”
“It is. You were forcefully held down by strangers not that long ago. Every time I bring up what happened, you don’t want to talk about it and that’s fine, for now. But I won’t risk restraining you and your mind considering me as a threat. Many people use certain kinks to work through past trauma, but this is all too soon. When we get back to New York, I will set up a time for you to meet with a therapist, hell, I’ll get you an entire team of them, but I need to know you are okay before we try anything too risky.”
I sat there for a minute, thinking through the words he was saying. “I understand your concerns, I really do, but you have to trust me, Leo. I feel better than I think I ever have.”
Leo pulled my gaze to his and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. “I hope that is true. But my concern for your mental health far outweighs my desire to force submission from you.”
“It’s not forcing anything. I am a willing participant,” I said, smiling up at him.
“Talia, I can be ruthless. We have so much that we need to discuss before we try anything like that.”
“Okay, so what do I need to know?”
“First, you probably need a submissive to train you.”
“Another woman? Like one you’ve been with before?”
“No, and gender doesn’t matter, really. I don’t want to force any of my needs on you without you realizing how much control you have in each situation.”
“So things like safe words are important, right?”
“Very.”
“What is yours?”
“I’ve always used Red, Yellow and Green. It seems easiest since the club uses them, too.”
“Okay, so I say red when I want you to stop.”
“Yes. Everything stops immediately with red. Yellow tells me you are getting close to your limit. Green obviously means you are good.”
“So limits like where I let you touch me.”
“Yes.”
“But I’ve changed that already. It doesn’t bother me if you touch my side any more. Does that mean I messed that up?”
“No, not necessarily. It just means things have changed, which they often do with a long-term partner. That is completely natural.”
I looked at Leo and realized I wanted this more than I would have expected. Not only did I want to please him, I wanted to see what Raven meant when she said she thought she found the missing piece. Sex was fine, but nothing spectacular. I’d never had a strong emotional connection to any of it though, and maybe that was because I needed this too.
“Are there things we can do without you restraining me? Other things that you like and I could learn?”
His smile widened, “Yes, Little Bird. There are lots of things we can try.”
I leaned forward and caught his lips with my own. “I liked what you did to me at the cafe.”
“It’s called edging. It’s a way of asserting control while still enjoying the process. Besides, I have a hard time keeping my hands from you, so that may be one you’ll need to get used to.”
