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My heart starts to pound. “What do you mean? Have you heard something?”
“Oh, no, nothing like that. Nothing nefarious,” she says, chuckling. “I just mean that it seems like sometimes things fall into place in ways we never could have predicted, but that turned out to be perfect. Painful sometimes, but still… perfect.”
I swallow hard, her words resonating with me more than she can possibly imagine. “I understand that.”
“Do you?” She smiles. “Because I really do believe that life leads us toward who we’re meant to be, even if we don’t see it at first. Even if we actively resist it.” She pauses, then adds, “But when we quit resisting, when we embrace it, there’s nothing more liberating than finally becoming the person we were always meant to be.”
I understand exactly what she’s saying, and it puts a lump in my throat. I remember doing everything I could to keep Chloe away from all gang activity in Halston, and now here I am, being offered a spot at the top of the criminal food chain. From one perspective, it doesn’t make any sense. But at the same time, it feels like my time with the Reapers didn’t force me down that path or shape me into something new.
It feels like it helped me discover not just who I truly am, but also the person Iwantto be.
I bite my lip, hesitating. I’m still not sure if that person should be part of The Six, though.
Ayla sits with me without any sign of impatience while these thoughts tumble through my head, giving me all the space I asked for to really consider things.
“I’ve fallen in love with three men too,” I finally tell her, the words coming slowly as I try to put my thoughts into order. “And after all the shit that went down with Austin…”
I swallow hard, reliving those moments of terror again, when we heard him start to torture Dante over the phone. When we arrived at his house and didn’t know if Dante was dead or alive. The soul-deep relief and joy I felt afterward, having all of my men home and safe and whole.
It’s that last one that has me hesitating. I can’t give that up. I won’t.
“We barely came through it alive. I know this world I’m a part of now is dangerous, and that loving them means accepting that. But that doesn’t mean I’m willing to invite more of it into our lives.”
“I don’t think we always have a choice about that,” Ayla says, giving me a sympathetic smile.
She’s right. I know she is. But still, “Getting even more deeply involved the way a position with The Six would require seems like I’d be inviting even more danger into our lives. I’ll be honest, I’m just not sure if I can handle constantly living under that kind of threat and uncertainty. Losing them, any one of them, isn’t something I think I’d survive. Along with my sister, those three men are my everything.”
Ayla nods. “I get that, I really do. And the truth is that you’re right. Being at the top of the food chain means there’s always a target on your back. This thing with West Point proves that in spades. But Riley, have you ever heard that saying,with great power comes great responsibility?”
“Yeah, of course.”
She smiles, and this one rivals some of Maddoc’s for sheer predatory dominance. “Well, the reverse is also true. With great responsibility comes a shitload of power. When you’re at the top of the food chain, you have the means to protect yourself. And more importantly, the people you love.”
She glances through the open door at the rest of The Six. No, athermen, Marcus, Theo, and Ryland.
The deep, open love on her face gives me a moment of understanding and a sense of sisterhood with her that goes even further than her poignant words. The two of us really are more similar than I ever would have expected, and the epiphany settles all my doubts, freeing something in my spirit.
For so long, my purpose was simply to keep Chloe safe and to give her a better life. Through all the chaos of the last months, I never stopped to ask myself what my purpose will be going forward. Now, Ayla’s just showed me that it doesn’t have to change. Instead, it can expand to includeallthe people I love.
I smile at her. “Yes.”
Ayla’s eyes brighten. “Yes, you’re accepting our offer?”
I sit a little straighter. “I am. I’m ready to become part of The Six. I’m ready to protect my family.”
When we rejoin the others, each of The Six gives me a genuine welcome, but thankfully, don’t seem to expect anything else from me for now. They tell me that more information will be forthcoming, then dismiss us for the evening.
I’m still in shock when we get home, but under it is a bubbling sort of excitement about the future that I’ve honestly never had before.
“I’m so fucking proud of you,” Dante says as all three of them surround me, the fine lines of strain around his eyes from being on his feet all day eclipsed by the warmth in his eyes.
He pulls me close, kissing me thoroughly, then passes me to Logan. I get equal treatment from him before he captures my throat in his hand, stroking it softly as he looks down into my eyes.
“They made a good choice,” he tells me seriously. “You’ll be an asset to this city.”
“The darker parts of it, at least,” I tease him.
His lips twitch up, his grip tightening for a moment in a shared reminder of the connection we share. “The darker parts of it,” he agrees.
