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“Diego is likely going to take it better than you think he is. Out of the pair of them, he is calmer than Sofia.”
I smile. “I’ll take that into consideration when I try to start unraveling this tangled knot of shit that is my life right now.”
“Well, I just wanted to stop by and tell you and my little niece or nephew that I’m going back home for a few days. I have some connections watching the borders to make sure that your parents don’t try to leave the country. I want to touch base with them in person.”
“Brennan, you don’t have to do that.”
He shrugs. “Salvatore is going to call me when he needs me to come back. I’m guessing I’ll be back out here soon.”
“Thank you for everything you’ve done for me over the years,” I say as I pull him into another hug. “If anything happens to me, I just want you to know that I appreciate everything that you’ve done and sacrificed to take care of me.”
Brennan holds me tight for a couple minutes before stepping back. “If we stay like this any longer, I’m going to start crying.”
I laugh and wipe away a tear that falls. “Stop making fun of me.”
“Love you, Brielle. You call me if you need anything and make sure that Salvatore doesn’t get too lost in his self-loathing.”
“Love you too, Brennan.”
When he leaves the room, I take a moment to gather myself before going in search of Salvatore.
I find him in Matteo’s room, sitting in a chair and holding his brother’s hand. His eyes are dry but his bottom lip quivers. I don’t want to disturb them, but Salvatore hasn’t eaten anything since yesterday afternoon and he’s only wearing a pair of shorts. There are still splatters of blood on his torso that didn’t get washed away last night.
“Salvatore,” I say as I walk over to him and put my hand on his shoulder. “You still have some blood on you. Why don’t you go get cleaned up and I’ll sit with Matteo for a little bit?”
He shakes his head, not bothering to look at me. I sigh and rub his shoulder, massaging the tense muscles.
“You need to eat something and you need to get cleaned up. I will sit with him while you go get something to eat. I promise that I’ll come get you the moment I think he might be waking up, okay?”
Salvatore glances up at me, a haunted look in his eyes. It feels like a knife through the chest. While I might be blaming myself for what happened, Salvatore is the embodiment of that blame. He’s been the one to protect his family for so long and now the identity his father created for him is finally shattering.
“Please,” I say, leaning down to kiss his forehead. “Go take a minute for yourself. I’ll let you know if anything happens.”
Finally, he nods and gets up. He pauses to kiss me before leaving the room.
Please don’t let this consume him.
I take his empty seat and lean forward. Matteo’s chest rises and falls slowly. The monitors hooked to him beep quietly.
“You know,” I say to Matteo, though I don’t think he can hear me. “If you die on your brother, I’m never going to forgive you. I know he wanted to go out and make a name for himself, and prove himself to you and the others, but he really does view himself as the protector. If you die, I don’t think he’ll be able to live with himself.”
With a sigh, I take Matteo’s hand and run my thumb over the veins on the back of it. He doesn’t move at all.
“I love him. I’m not going to lose him because you decided to be selfish and die.”
He still doesn’t move. I glance at the pitcher of water beside his bed and consider dumping it over him. If it wakes him up, it might be worth it.
“You need to live through this, Matteo. If you don’t, the whole family is going to lose two brothers at once because they’ll lose Salvatore forever too. He’ll slip away into someone he’s not. I don’t want to lose him when I’ve just figured out how much I want him.”
I sigh and hold his hand a little tighter as the machines continue to beep.
Please live. I need you to live. I can’t lose you and I really can’t lose Salvatore.
26
SALVATORE
After I’m done eating breakfast, I hunt down Damien and Gio. Both of them are sitting in Damien’s office, though neither of them are talking about anything. Hell, they’re barely looking at each other.
