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I groan and sit in the chair beside Matteo’s bed. “You know something, brother, I don’t think I could make this entire situation worse if I tried. She’s pissed off with me now, though that was my goal. I don’t want her to tell me that everything is going to be alright when we don’t know that.”
Matteo doesn’t say anything — not that I expect him to. He still doesn’t show any signs of waking up, though I wish he would.
“If I had told Brennan that I wasn’t going to watch over her, she wouldn’t have been dragged deeper into this world. She might have still been able to hide from her parents. I was the one who took her out and spent time with her. I was the one pretending that there weren’t people after her.”
My mind races with all the ways life would have been different if I didn’t agree to watch Brielle. We wouldn’t be here right now. I wouldn’t have a baby on the way. I wouldn’t be in love with a woman I had been waiting my whole life to meet.
Watching over her had only brought good into our lives. It was me allowing her not to hide away that brought the bad.
“You need to wake up, Matteo. I don’t know how I’m going to deal with the rest of this shit without you. I’m tired of being the family weapon. I don’t want to bear the weight of being the one who is supposed to protect everyone anymore. I’m tired.”
I sigh and run a hand through my hair.
“I think I ruined things with Brielle. I was cruel. I know that she is blaming herself for this just as much as I am, and I just told her to stay away from me.”
Matteo coughs and opens his eyes slowly, squinting against the bright light. “Well, nobody ever said you were smart.”
27
BRIELLE
Brennan is sitting in the kitchen when I walk in. I raise an eyebrow as I watch him eat ice cream straight from the container.
“I thought you were leaving two days ago,” I say as I open a drawer and grab a second spoon.
Brennan chuckles as I sit on the counter beside him and dig my spoon into the container. “Well, Salvatore called me before I could even get out of the state. Funny how much you all seem to need me these days. Makes me think that maybe I should start a mafia of my own.”
“You would never want to be in charge of that many people.” I eat a spoonful of ice cream before scooping up a second one. “You hate being in charge of people. I don’t know how you even took care of our household and put me through high school.”
Brennan nudged me with his elbow. “I did it out of love and spite. You were a pain in the ass as a teenager and going to high school pissed you off.”
I grin and take another spoonful of ice cream. “And here we have the real motivation.”
Tyson pops his head into the room and nods at me before glancing at Brennan. “We’re meeting now.”
Brennan hands me the ice cream and slides off the counter. “That’s my cue. I’ll see you later, kiddo. Give whatever is bothering you some time and then I’m sure it will all work itself out.”
“Yes, oh wise one.”
He laughs and flips me off as he walks out of the room.
The second I’m alone, the guilt starts washing through me again. Salvatore wouldn’t be locked in his brother’s room right now if I hadn’t dragged them into the mess that is my life.
I should have fought harder to keep Salvatore from watching over me. I was too scared at the time to see what I was doing to them.
“It’s my fault they all got hurt,” I say to the empty room as I scoop up more ice cream.
“Well, I don’t know what telling an empty room a lie is going to do,” Salvatore says as he enters the room.
I look up and see the dark circles beneath his eyes. He’s been sitting in Matteo’s room for most of the last two days. I haven’t seen him come out since he told me to leave the room.
“You wouldn’t have been anywhere near my parents if I hadn’t put you there.”
“They’re trying to fuck over the Alvarez cartel. I would have had to get involved with your parents one way or another.”
I shrug and eat another spoonful of ice cream. “Agree to disagree.”
He sighs and runs his hand down his face. “I came in here because Matteo is awake and asking for you. I didn’t come in here to pick a fight with you over who is really the one who should be blamed for all of this.”
