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Sucking a long gulp into my lungs, I lower myself to my knees.
As I do so, I notice a shadow of disappointment and something else crossing his face.
Fuck him. He won’t break me.
My name is Winter Cavanaugh. I’m not Lia Volkov and I’m no way in hell this madman’s wife.
I chant that in my head in preparation for what’s to come. To say I’m not scared would be a lie, but my dignity keeps me upright.
“It’s unfortunate that you chose the high road with me. Very unfortunate.” The smoothness in his voice sends chills down my spine.
“You have your conditions and I have mine.”
“Holding on to your conditions will only heighten your suffering. Understand this, Lia. I’m not to be crossed or defied. The harder you push me, the more ruthless I become. The greater you challenge me, the harsher I react. You donotwant me to react, and you certainly do not want to see my inhuman side. I’ve been showing you mercy, so be grateful for it.”
“Mercy?” I mean to scoff, but my lips tremble due to the assault of his words. “In what world are your actions a show of mercy?”
“Believe me, they are.”
“You might think of them as such, you might consider yourself some sort of a twisted, gracious god, but you’re not. You’re cruel and callous. You’re brutal and sadistic. You’re perverted, too, because you get off on inflicting pain. Your calm and quiet demeanor doesn’t fool me, and neither does your warped sense ofbenevolence. Your sole purpose is to hurt and take as you see fit. So don’t stand there, holding a fuckingbelt, and say that you’re showing mercy.”
I’m breathing heavily after my outburst, and I’m fully prepared for the number of punishments to go up, because that’s what sick bastards like Adrian do; they use any chance to turn the circumstances against you.
It’d be worth it.
For the first time since I stepped on his radar, I’ve given him a piece of my mind.
A cold object touches my cheek—the belt. He taps it gently against my skin—dotingly, even—but his expression remains the same, impassive and unreachable.
“If I’m perverted for liking to inflict pain, what does it make you if you enjoy it?”
My cheeks redden, both at his statement and especially at his veiled admittance. That hedoesenjoy inflicting pain. That I wasn’t wrong for recognizing his need for control. But I push those to the back of my head as I lift my chin. “I donotenjoy it.”
“You came all over my fingers this morning after a mere spanking. What do you think will happen when I whip you?”
“Nothing.”
“Do you truly believe that or are you hoping for it? If it’s the latter, I recommend that you abandon such hopes, because you’ll learn the hard way that I was indeed lenient. That I was giving you leeway and that you lost those privileges by resisting me.”
“Just get it over with.”
“You’ll come to regret your impatience when your skin is red, Lia.”
The coolly-spoken threat covers me with goosebumps and to my doom, not all of them are due to dread.
Adrian picks me up in his arms and I gasp as he carries me to the bed. I’m momentarily distracted by how small I am in his hold, how he could easily crush me into irredeemable pieces without effort.
He drops me on the mattress, face down, and it dips under our weight. Did he change his mind?
I lift myself on all fours, but I don’t get to celebrate the thought before he flattens his palm on the small of my back, keeping me in place. My heart jolts and picks up in speed when his hand leaves my back and brushes against my hair.
Unlike his earlier demeanor, his touch is gentle, or pretending to be, anyway. His fingers sink into my strands, and I realize with horror that I’m leaning into his palm.
I try to buck against him, but he stiffens his fingers in my hair so they’re gripping my skull, communicating without a word that I’m not to fight him.
I couldn’t even if I wanted to.
I’m frozen in place, caught hook, line, and sinker in the depths of his chilling calm. It’s on the surface, a façade, and I’m learning the hard way that there are multiple layers to him. The more I peel away, the deeper and darker it becomes. Each one is more alarming than the one before.
