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“But...he wouldn’t kill you. You’re his son.”
“I’m his pawn. He only wants to control me.”
“Did he have any more children?”
“No. According to my father, he was shot in his groin not long after I went missing. Not sure if the bullet tore off his cock or if it was just fate refusing him another child. Either way, he never had another. I’m his one and only. Heir to his blood-soaked fortune and murderous empire.”
I shivered at how similar I’d turned out to be. How the violent urges within me were the product of being the offspring of a killer. Why I’d gone out of my way to never embrace them. Always chose calm over anger. Acceptance over fury. It was why I’d never let myself mourn my dead parents because whenever I thought of them...decomposing on the seafloor...the surge of absolute rage terrified me. Rage directed at my loved ones. At Cem Kara. At myself.
If I let go...truly let go...who the fuck knew what I was capable of.
“That’s why you don’t want me stepping foot there? Because you think he’d kill me for loving you?” Neri asked quietly.
I watched her as she rinsed between her legs, a flicker of memory and pain casting shadows over her face.
“I never want you stepping foot there because Kara still has men searching for me. He’s desperate to find me, not to welcome me into the family business but to tear me apart. He knows I’ll never be what he wants. He lost his heir the day I became an Avci, and right now, I’m his biggest enemy. I’m his greatest threat. And until he’s eliminated that threat, his empire isn’t safe.”
“But you wouldn’t go after his business. You want nothing to do with it.” Standing on one leg, Neri finished her bath with a quick scrub of her feet.
“Doesn’t matter. I’m alive. And that is not permitted.”
A cloud covered her face as she suddenly stood upright. Pieces fell into place in her horrified stare. “God, Aslan...y-you willingly hurt Ethan for me, all while knowing you’ll die if you’re deported back to Turkey?!”
“I’d kill anyone who ever laid a finger on you without your permission, askim.”
“But you can’t!” Her face twisted into fear. “You can’t, Aslan. Ever. Do you hear me? You can’t ever be caught. You can’t ever go back there.”
“I don’t plan on going back.”
“But if you ever feel the need to defend me. If you ever try to help—” She clamped both hands over her mouth before whispering, “The night you came to get me when I broke up with Joel and we kissed...you said you were stopped for a breath test.”
“I was.”
“You could’ve been arrested!”
“They didn’t ask for ID. And I wasn’t drinking. It was just routine.”
I didn’t tell her about the cop tonight. When I’d carried a semi-comatose Ethan in my arms. I’d been an illegal immigrant plotting a murder. The fact that I was still free showed fate was on my side.
For now.
“But still....” Tearing her hands through her hair, she waded through the sea. “God, how have you lived with this for so long? I’ve been so stupid. All along, I figured you were just being dramatic when you said I couldn’t follow you to Turkey. I was so sure I’d just go with you if you were ever caught. As long as I’m with you, I don’t care where we live—”
“And I love you for that but—”
“But now you’re telling me that if you get caught, that’s it for us? That it’s over because you’ll be killed?” She shook her head, her eyes brimming with fresh tears. “No. I can’t...no! That can’t happen. How are we supposed to live with that? How are we supposed to go anywhere? God, Aslan, how do you even leave the house without panicking? How are you so calm about this?”
I smiled gently, stepping into her to brush away her tears. “Now you know why I’m perfectly content in your garden. Why I don’t go out unless it’s necessary. Why I’m so fucking loyal to Jack and Anna because without them, I would’ve died years ago. They’re the reason I’ve survived this long. And to go behind their backs and fall in love with you makes me sick because...they are as good as the people who kept me as their own. Twice I’ve been lucky enough to be cared for by parents who aren’t mine by blood. That’s why I need to do this right, Neri. Why I need time to ensure Jack knows I didn’t have a choice when it came to you. That I can’t exist without you. That I didn’t intend for this to happen but—”
“We’ll get married. That will show them.”
“I wish I could. Don’t you think I haven’t thought that? It was what I was thinking about when you came into my room tonight before you went to Zara’s.” I winced and swallowed a growl, cursing fucking Ethan all over again. “I was so close to marching into town and buying you a ring and dropping to one knee in front of your parents.”
