AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Things didn’t work out that way, though, did they?” A hard, self-depreciating smile curved his mouth. “Oh, I became Prime. But my way ‘in’ with Knox hated me.”
And it appeared that he held Larkin responsible for that. Unreal.
“So I chose to not pursue the alliance. But then I began having issues with a couple of lairs. Issues I knew would come to a dramatic halt if I had the right backing.” He straightened. “I knew I would never get an alliance from Knox, but I also knew that my being bound to you would be as much of a deterrent to any Primes tempted to fuck with me. So I thought about perhaps attempting to earn your forgiveness in the hope that we would bond.”
Larkin’s demon peeled back its upper lip, thinking it a fine idea to bite off his ear.
“You’ll twist that; claim I meant to use you.”
Uh, his intention was to use her.
“But, really, it’s natural that anchors aid each other. I simply wanted what was rightfully mine: Your loyalty and support.”
Then he should have offered her the same in turn instead of expecting her to do all the giving.
“I was still deliberating on it when I came to Vegas on my previous trip. I hadn’t yet decided what to do. But the night I saw you from a distance looking so very alone even among your friends, something happened. All the progress I’d made with my demon went sailing out of the window.”
She frowned about as much as her avian features would allow.
“It metaphorically dived at you. Went insane with the need to get to you. It fought me for supremacy with such force that holding it back was painful. I had to leave the bar. Fast. But it didn’t calm down when you were out of sight. It continued to fight me for dominance.”
Larkin couldn’t imagine having to battle her inner demon that way. Hey, hers could be a trial at times. It took over at inopportune moments, and it wasn’t the most cooperative of beings. But it had never put up that kind of struggle.
“I went back to Canada quickly, thinking all would be fine if I put some distance between you and me. Instead, it only made my demon more unstable. It no longer felt any satisfaction in its power or position. It was no longer interested in working with me, or in us being in sync. No, it only wanted you.”
He paused, his nostrils flaring. “It wasn’t only the pull of the bond I then felt. It was the pull to let go and hand over full control to my demon. I’m not balancing on the knife-edge of rogue,” he added, his voice roughening, “but I’m at risk of being overpowered by my entity sometime in the near future. My control over it is precarious at best.”
An element of pity swirled in her stomach. To turn rogue was no joke. A person lost the part of themselves that made them a person. All that then existed was the demon. It ruled supreme. It wreaked havoc. It killed indiscriminately. Did whatever the hell it wished, basically.
Unmoved by his plight, her demon sniffed. It wasn’t feeling even a tiny hint of sympathy for him. Then again, such an emotion wasn’t something it generally experienced.
“So I came back to claim you before I lost the fight. At that point, the political advantages of our being bound would have merely been a bonus.” A glitter of menace bled into his eyes. “I thought you might delay forming the bond to punish me for leaving, but I hadn’t expected you to turn me away so completely. That was a mistake, wasn’t it? You’ll never agree to form the bond. Not even now, when you know it would save me. Your demon would sooner I perish, wouldn’t it?”
Maybe if he’d just told her about his struggles in the beginning she might have been open to it—she wasn’t a monster. But he hadn’t been truthful or genuine with her. He’d instead tried to trick, manipulate, and provoke her. More, he’d played games and even confronted Teague. And so they’d never know what decision she would have otherwise made.
But right now, considering Holt had caught her with a goddamn net, no, she had no plans to help him. Her demon—just as he suspected—would see him in hell before it would aid him in any way.
“I can’t allow that, Larkin. So I’ve taken the matter into my own hands.” He paused, settling his palms on his thighs. “That net is slowly draining you of psi-energy. At some point, you will be so drained that whatever mental wall you slammed up between us will fall. Our psyches will then clash, and the bond will form.”
She froze again, and her stomach bottomed out. No. No, no, no, no.
