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“You’re seriously going to go on with the show?” Vari ask.
“Of course. That’s what good directors do,” Hector says before turning to me. “Can you go on? If not, I’ll pull in your understudy.”
I nod my head without thinking. I can’t think about anything right now, and going onstage might help me to focus on something other than the terrible realization that I just had. “But what about—”
“Don’t worry about it,” Hector cuts me off. “I’ll pull in the understudy for the male role, and he’ll do fine. We’ll deal with the rest of this mess later.”
Everything that follows is a blur to me. The rescheduled show starts as if nothing has happened and I keep glancing to see Vari in the wings, calmly and quietly following along. On stage I perform my role perfectly, even under such duress. Every time I look at the actor opposite me, all I can see is the dead, open-eyed face of the original actor. Even so, I knock my performance out of the park. It’s almost as if the adrenaline rush, the intensity of the fear and the dire situation fuel my performance even further, allowing me to get into the tragic depths of the role I’m playing. The terrible, horrific incident makes the role I’m playing on stage feel even more real, and allows me to connect with my character on a level I wish I couldn’t. I seize this violent opportunity and use it to fuel my rise to fame as a Broadway actress. After this performance, my foot will most definitely be in the door.
In the quiet moments between scenes, as I stand offstage in the shadows, I wonder to myself if it makes me an evil person to have used someone’s tragic murder as a launching point for my career. I don’t even dare wonder what my mother would think about it. At least it’s keeping me from thinking too much about Vari’s role in what appears to be a staged drug overdose. But I can’t cast him out of my mind completely. I find myself glancing at him periodically throughout the show, finding his eyes staring back at me in the dark. Even he looks impressed. I bet he’s rather astounded by how well I was able to collect myself and continue on with the performance, even in the midst of violence and dark pressure.
After the performance ends, and after an encore and standing ovation, everyone returns timidly backstage. This should be a time of enormous celebration for a successful opening night, but instead there is confusion, doubt and worry as we all wait to see what’s going to happen next. I know for a fact that this wasn’t an accidental overdose, but murder. The poor guy was a vegan and cross-trainer who worked out for hours every day. I even heard him talk once about how he would never put poison like street drugs into his “temple.”
As I stand there with the cast after our final encore, I catch a glimpse of Vari coming backstage. I don’t want to risk him collecting me and taking me back to his place tonight. These last 24 hours have been traumatic, to say the least, and all I want to do right is go see my mom and stay with her tonight. I don’t have the energy to debate my plans with Vari, so I weave my way through the crowd and take off through the back door as fast as my feet can carry me. I’m about to go to the subway and make my way to her house, when suddenly out of nowhere Hector appears with three other men I’ve never seen before, bruisers all. Grasping my arm tightly, he whispers, “Into the car, sweetheart,” showing me a peek of the gun he has under his jacket. With seemingly no other choice in the matter, I get in, and we take off.
12
VARI
After the show, I try to find Dahlia to talk to her about everything that’s happened. But I look everywhere for her and wind up emptyhanded. She’s already gone. I very rarely panic, but I’m on the verge of it now.
“What’s up?” Alessio says when he picks up my frantic phone call.
“Dahlia’s run off and I can’t find her,” I say with audible stress lining my voice. “Send some of the crew to try and find her. Fuck, send all of the crew if you need to—just find her.”
After an hour with no word and no one in myborgataable to turn up where she is, I have one final option I can use as a last resort. “Hello, Iris,” I say into the phone as I sit in my car and think about my next move. “This is Vari Roberto.”
There’s a long moment of dead silence on the phone as I wait for Iris Limone to answer me. Dahlia’s mother has never been a fan of mine, but I know we do share one thing in common. We both love Dahlia, and if she’s in danger, then Iris will do everything she can to help me find her.
“Has something happened?” Iris says after the long pause. Her voice is shaking.
“I’m not sure. I’m looking for Dahlia and I can’t find her.”
“Maybe she’s hiding from you.”
“Come on now, Iris,” I say as I try to appeal to her common sense. “You and I both know I’m not the wolf in the woods here. There’s something rancid going on behind the curtains of our theatre, and I think Dahlia’s in danger. I can’t find her. Can you help?”
“I haven’t heard from her tonight,” she replies. I can tell that Iris is being honest because she sounds worried. “God, do you think something’s happened to her?”
“I have no reason to believe that yet,” I say as I try to calm her nerves. “I’m just trying to find her so I can ensure she’s safe. In fact, since things seem to be rather unstable in the city right now, let me send a car to pick you up and bring you to my place.”
“Why in the world would I want to spend time at your place?” Iris asks.
“Because then once I find her, you’ll be the first to know. And because I want to keep you safe too. I know you and I haven’t always seen eye-to-eye, but we both care about Dahlia. There’s definitely something going on and I’m not sure what it is. I usually have a tight read on the city, but I can’t seem to figure out who’s behind all of this. Whatever’s going on, and whatever the endgame is for the person behind it, I need to get out ahead of it. That starts with making sure the people I care about are safe.”
At first, Dahlia’s mom is resistant to the idea, but then she finally sighs and says, “Fine, send a car. I’ll be ready.”
As soon as I have Iris back at my place to stay with my son, and I know they’re both safely guarded inside, I go off to find Dahlia on my own. My men might not have succeeded in tracking her down, but I’m mad as hell and ready to kill to find the woman I now know I’m madly in love with. Despite my outward denial of my feelings for Dahlia, I’ll rearrange this entire city if I need to in order to bring her back safely home with me.
“Will you be back home soon?” Lucas asks as I head out the door, leaving him in the capable care of Iris, who I trust far more than she trusts me.
“Yes, I’ll be back as soon as I can,” I answer my son.
“And you’ll be bringing Dahlia back with you too?”
I nod and reach out to rustle my fingers in his hair for a second before I step out into the hallway. “Yes—I promise.”
13
