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“I don’t know what you want me to say, Hunter. Basements freak me out, and Carlo mentioned one. I panicked. It’s not that big of a deal.”
He sighed and shook his head. “I know that Carlo’s a good friend, but he’s involved in things that aren’t safe, and I want to make sure the basement was the only thing that happened.” I stared at him for a moment, wondering what exactly he knew. “He’s been involved in some sketchy shit for as long as I’ve known him. I’m not going to let you be a part of it.”
“Whatever Carlo does during his free time has nothing to do with me. He and his brothers have their own lives, and I’m not concerned with them.”
Hunter didn’t look convinced but didn’t say anything for a long moment. He continued driving, stopping at a red light and tapping his fingers on the wheel.
I sighed. “What?” I pushed, his anxious energy giving me anxiety.
“Have I ever told you that you’re a horrible liar?” he asked. I raised my brows and looked at him. “I didn’t tell you as a teenager. I’d just ask where you were going, and you always told the truth, so it was never much of a problem. But knowing when you weren’t being truthful was always nice so I could keep you safe. In the past few months, you’ve told more lies than you’ve told truths.”
I stiffened, exhaling a long breath and nodding. I had been lying often, but I never thought he’dknow.“There’s just—” I cut myself off, knowing I couldn’t elaborate on the lies. I wanted to tell him the truth so badly, but I couldn’t. “I’ve had a lot going on, and I can’t talk about it yet.”
“The only other time you’ve ever lied to me this much is when you got that scar,” Hunter said, glancing up at the stark line across my forehead. “And anytime anything related to that came up. Don’t think I haven’t connected a few dots. Basements, nightclubs. Those things have your skin crawling, and they never used to. I know you didn’t just fall, Sierra.”
The car fell silent, and I stared out the window. Lying about Carlo was one thing, but lying about what happened to me felt like an entirely different type of deceit. I wasn’t doing this to protect him. I was lying to protectmyself.“I’m not ready to talk about that, Hunter,” I told him.
“Then talk to me about this thing with Carlo. Tell mesomething.”
I’d never heard him so desperate, and I realized for the first time exactly how much he was worried about me. He should be, especially with the shit I was becoming involved in, but I couldn’t validate that. For his own sake, he needed to stay as far from the truth as possible. “Can you just trust that I’m doing everything I can to stay safe?”
After a few minutes of no reply, I didn’t expect him to answer. Especially not as we pulled in front of the Bonanno house and he parked the truck. He grabbed my arm when I reached for the door to step out. “You don’t have to tell me anything if it makes you uncomfortable,” he told me, shaking his head. “But you have to know that all I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy, no matter what that looks like.”
Carlo strode from the house, both of his hands in his pockets as he looked at Hunter’s truck. I focused on his forearms and the way they bulged from his T-shirt. God, he was attractive. “No matter what?” I asked, my eyes not leaving Carlo.
“As long as you’re safe,” he elaborated, and somehow, I knew the implications of that statement. I knew that “as long as you’re safe” meant as long as I wasn’t with Carlo. I nodded, though I wouldn’t verbally agree to anything. Not when he was asking something from me I couldn’t promise.
Carlo came to the passenger side of the truck and opened the door for me. I gave him a tight smile as I passed him, deciding he could deal with Hunter from here. I patted his shoulder before making my way into his house. Mercifully, it was Tommy sitting at the bar, eating a bowl of cereal. I didn’t think I could handle chiding from Louis after the last time I’d seen him, but I had a feeling Bella’s questioning would be even worse.
“I wasn’t sure if I’d see you back here after they had you doing all the work the other day,” Tommy said, patting the seat beside him. He didn’t mention that “doing all the work” ended with Carlo inviting me down into their basement and me freaking out as if my life was on the line. Instead of acknowledging what had happened, I allowed myself to push it from my memory. Maybe he wouldn’t bring it up, either. It would make this conversation much smoother.
“There’s too much to do for me to stay away,” I commented, gesturing to the wide hole in the wall. It looked like the electrician had torn out the surrounding parts of the wall to access the wires better.
“If you send me a few YouTube tutorials, I can figure out how to fix the wall and do the renovations myself,” he offered, giving me an earnest look. “I know you’re busy with your own job and with finding information for us. You don’t need to waste more time on us than you’re already obligated.”
“You could just offer to let me out of this bargain with your brothers,” I suggested.
“If I could, I would.” He shook his head. “This life isn’t the one I signed up for.”
I saw a hint of torment in his eyes, and I focused on it, furrowing my brows. “But you got out,” I told him. “Once this is handled, you’re free.”
He shook his head. “Sierra, if there’s one thing about mob life, it’s that there’s no such thing as getting out. Some people are privileged enough to take an exodus for a few years, but the mob is like a black hole, and all the people involved in this life are forced to stay in its gravity until they die.”
“After this is done—”
“No,” he cut me off. “The things I went through before Dad died…nothing will ever wipe away that stain. I was the youngest. The nerdiest. The least interested in being a part of the mafia. For that, I suffered in a way my brothers didn’t. Even if I manage to pull myself out of this, that’ll always be ingrained in here.” He pointed to his chest, and I saw how much this had affected him. How much he hated this life. I didn’t say anything as I placed a hand on top of his and nodded. It sounded like he and Carlo shared that sentiment. I didn’t understand exactly what he had gone through, but I understood how it felt to be trapped in an internal catalyst of outrage and hurt—to be trapped in the pain of a situation that had long passed.
“It sounds like you all suffered in your own ways,” I said, thinking back on the gruesome brand Carlo had shown me. I never thought I’d be as angry as I’d been when he told me what his father had done to him, and I knew that Tommy had likely endured more of the same.
We didn’t speak for a long moment. I realized that neither Hunter nor Carlo had brought in a load of materials, and my brows knit together before I pushed back from the counter and placed a hand on Tommy’s back. “I need to go and check on them,” I told him, wrapping my arms around his chest in a makeshift hug. “But thank you for trusting me enough to talk to me.” His eyes remained dark, but he patted my arm, acknowledging that he’d heard what I told him.
I bounded out the door and back toward Hunter’s truck. He and Carlo stood close together and were speaking. I could feel the tension of the conversation from where I stood, though I couldn’t hear a single word. “What’s going on?” I asked.
Hunter whipped his head toward me, his eyes softening. He smiled, but I could see the shift as clear as day. They had been discussing something serious, and I had a sinking feeling it was about me. Hunter didn’t say anything as he came and enveloped me in one of his big, brotherly hugs before ruffling my hair and walking toward his house.
I glanced at Carlo. “What was that about?” I asked when Hunter was out of earshot. He only shook his head and grabbed a bag and bucket of drywall mud from the truck before leaving me alone outside, wondering what the hell they’d been discussing and why they wouldn’t tell me.
17
