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His thumb brushed the single dimple in my cheek. “Fucking love this dimple. Always have.”
It was a strange dynamic. Having had a sexual relationship with a man who was very intense and not remembering any of it. This had never been an issue with Isaac. He’d not made me feel this way. Looking at him didn’t make my stomach flutter or my heart race. Not once had he said or done something to make me need to squeeze my thighs together. A part of me wished I remembered this—us—but then I’d remember what I had done. I didn’t think I wanted that on my chest.
Hearing what I had done and living through it would be two different things.
“I can’t lean forward yet, baby,” he said, looking down at my lips. “Hurts too bad. You’re gonna have to come to me. I’ve waited five long fucking years, and I need this mouth.”
My entire body felt feverish. With my heart pounding in my chest, I scooted closer and leaned in, careful not to touch his chest or ribs, and pressed a kiss to his mouth. I’d caught myself staring at his mouth while he slept more than once. Wondering what it would feel like to kiss it. Feel his lips move over mine.
He cupped my face as his tongue slid into my mouth. The warmth from our breaths mingled, and I smelled the mint of his toothpaste. He moved his head slightly and plunged deeper. I wanted to press myself against him and get closer. Feel his body heat. I was careful though, not wanting to cause him any pain.
I felt his hand slide up my leg, then inside my shorts. My breath caught, and I started to pull back. His eyes locked on me, and he shook his head. Leaning back in, I felt small little flicks of his tongue along my bottom lip before he pressed his mouth to mine once more. His hand pushed open my legs, and I stopped breathing completely as he moved his fingers inside my shorts until his fingertips brushed my damp panties.
He broke the kiss, his breaths coming in hard, but his forehead rested on mine. “You’re already wet,” he whispered against my lips.
“You excite me,” I replied honestly.
“Fuck, you’re gonna kill me,” he groaned.
A knock on the door startled me, and I moved back, turning toward the door and pressing my open legs back together just in time for Levi to enter the room.
He glanced at me, then at Gage. “We’re heading out.”
“Good,” Gage replied tightly.
Levi gave him a knowing grin. “You sound anxious to get rid of us.”
“Yeah,” he agreed.
Levi looked back at me. “Feels almost like old times. Except you’re not a bitch.”
“Levi.” The warning in Gage’s voice made me tense.
However, Levi laughed, clearly amused.
“Take care of him, Nurse,” he drawled, looking amused as he closed the door.
“I wasn’t done.” Gage’s tone was husky.
I turned back to him, and his gaze dropped back to my mouth.
“Give me that mouth, Shiloh.”
Twenty-Two
Gage
They were fucking gone. Two days of having Shiloh all to myself. I’d listened to Huck and Blaise remind me how badly this girl had messed me up the last time. Levi had been the only one to point out how different she was now. Blaise hadn’t been around this version of her, but he’d said that wasn’t the point. They all thought I was fucking crazy anyway, and there was a part of me that knew I was wired differently from others. That, compounded with my obsession with this woman, had made me fucking mental. They acted like I’d forgotten, but I remembered.
What would happen when this Shiloh saw how dark and twisted I could be? If she got a glimpse of the me I kept just under the surface? The girl she’d been before freaked the fuck out. Turned on me and never looked back. The spiral that had come from that, I never wanted to repeat it.
Blaise had said I didn’t love her, and I knew he didn’t think I had it in me to love. He’d said what I’d experienced with Shiloh was infatuation on a level that was dangerous. If that was what she had on me—this fucking insane pull—I didn’t care. I’d tried to hate her, I’d tried to quit her, and then Levi had told me she was on a motherfucking date. I snapped. The outcome hadn’t been a pleasant one for anyone in this house.
She was here now. With me. And damn if she was leaving me again. Not until I was done. When I could get my fucking fill and let her go, then she could leave. If that day came.
Watching her prepare the bed for me to stretch out on and get the pillows piled up made the damn beast inside of me roar. He only seemed to wake up in her presence. No one else had ever triggered it. When she had it to her liking, she turned to look at me. I was trying real fucking hard to slow myself down. Demanding she walk around naked the next two days wasn’t going to go over well, and I knew that. But damn if I didn’t want to demand it.
“Ready?” she asked, walking over to me.
