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“Actually, yeah,” he says seriously. “I should probably show you some self-defense moves.”
“Oh god.” I roll my eyes. “Kai, I don’t think I’d be able to do something like that under pressure.”
“If I can, you can.”
“Yes, but you’re a professional boxer. I’m a journalist.”
“Then you should always have a pen on you, right?”
I smile. “Usually.”
“That’s good enough.”
“Okay.”
Silence fills the phone, thoughts seeping in about how we shouldn’t be on the phone but sitting right next to each other having this conversation. But we’re not. I could sit here and tear myself up about it, or do something else.
“What are you wearing, Kai?”
A deep rumble of laughter fills my ear and I can’t help but just bask in it, thinking about how long it’s been since I’ve heard it last. “I’m not playing this game with you, Molly.”
“Why not?”
“Because I can’t come home to hunt you down.”
“But we could always do that phone sex thing you wanted to—”
“Is that what we’re doing now? You want to make it to where I stroke my cock to memories of you?”
“Kai,” I mutter. “Don’t be like that.”
“Like what? My woman isn’t here. I’m not going to play games when you won’t tell me where you are. Not until I know where we stand with everything.”
I nod even though he can’t see me. “I get it. We can do that whenever you’re ready.”
“I’m ready when you are, sweetheart.”
So am I.
“Where?” I ask, knowing that no matter where he wants to meet up, there’s only one place where Kai is going to get it through his head that I’m back. That I want us to move past this.
“I’ll leave that up to you,” he replies solemnly. “Meanwhile, you can tell me what baby names you’ve come up with.”
I haven’t.
Because it doesn’t feel right moving forward with anything without Kai, and he’s changing the subject.
He’s shutting down and I’m making all this worse with each passing day.
“How about I come tell you myself?”
“When?” His tone is sharp and cynical, as if I’m teasing him again. But it couldn’t be further from the truth. Kai has his guard up, waiting for another ball to drop, and I did that to him.
Did I have my reasons? Yes.
Could I have tried harder before leaving? Also yes.
You don’t leave at the first sign of trouble, and I snuck out like a teenager wanting to run away without looking back.
