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“Fix it? How could we possibly fix what we did?”
“By doing it again? If it was a fluke or—what did you call it? A mistake? Then we’ll feel nothing and there’s no reason for either one of us to be worried. Let’s try it and see.”
“That’s ridiculous.” She tried to put a wing chair between them, but Tobias snagged her arm and wouldn’t let go. Still, he didn’t attempt to follow through on his threat to kiss her again. “Let go.” She yanked her arm free, knowing full well if he’d wanted to hold on to her, he could have.
“Is that what you want? Him? Take me out of the equation. If things were all right between the two of you, you wouldn’t have kissed another guy. Admit it. Who’s to say you’re not going to go kissing someone else?”
“You know I’m not like that.”
“How’s that when you did it to me, his very best friend?” Tobias tilted his shaggy head to one side. “That mean desire got the best of you?” He looked extremely pleased by the thought.
“It shouldn’t have happened. I regret it.”
Tobias crossed his arms over his chest, his gaze narrowed on her thoughtfully. “Are you sure you regret it? That kind of passion doesn’t happen every day.”
She struggled to focus, her hands fisting even though she’d never struck another living soul in her life. “That kind of passion leads nowhere and I won’t be a part of it again.” The moment the words were out of her mouth she knew she’d said too much.
“This is getting interesting. Again, huh? Who was he?”
“Leave. Now.”
Once more he stopped her and kept her close. “Does Garret know about the guy or are you keeping him a secret, too?”
“It was a long time ago.”
“He doesn’t know, then.”
“He knows I was with someone.”
“What happened?”
“I fell in lust and thought it was love. End of story. Surprised?”
“That you could experience lust? No, you’re a very passionate woman.”
Garret didn’t think so. She saw it in his eyes whenever they were together. Sometimes she’d been able to get into things and enjoy the closeness, but lately…
Tobias stepped forward, lifted his hand and smoothed his knuckles along her cheek. “Jocelyn? What are you afraid of? Are you afraid of feeling too much? Is that it?”
“I’mnotdiscussing this with you.”
“Why not? Obviously you can’t discuss it with Garret. Tell me.”
“Fine. You want to know? I don’t trust blazing, gotta-have-you-now desire. It’s pure lust and it means next to nothing. I had that and I got burned.”
“How?”
“He used me for money and when I couldn’t give him any more to fund his art, he left. End of story. Are you happy now?”
A muscle ticked in his jaw. “So you’re going to marry Garret because hedoesn’tmake you burn?”
Why wouldn’t he just shut up?
“I don’t like the thought of you getting hurt because some ass used you and abused you. But I’m not him. I don’t want your money, and I’m man enough to know something special when I see it. When Ifeelit. That kiss—”
“Was nothing. Just like I had before. What about the guilt and pain we’d feel? What about decency? What about Garret?”
“He’s a man, not a little boy. The question is, are you a woman or a little girl playing at being an adult? You only get one life, Jocelyn. You either live it or you drag yourself through it. I love Garret like a brother, but the two of you are not married. You’re not even engaged. You have time to fix the mistake by ending this before it gets worse.”
