AllFreeNovel
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When we were kids, our dad always said that sharing a cigar with someone was a good way to call a truce. Sharing a cigar can be an intimate thing if you want it to be. Or it can just be business. But the softness in my brother’s eyes that reminds me of when we were kids tells me that this is it. This is Ghost calling a truce.
Just like our dad taught us.
I let him prep it for me since Ghost and Dad are the big cigar smokers in the family. I never really had time before going to prison to become one.
I take the cigar from him and take a puff of it while he gets his own ready and lit.
We sit in silence, puffing on our cigars as the delicious smell consumes the room around us.
Ghost heaves a sigh and taps his ring against the wood of his desk. “I’m sorry.”
“Gho-”
His raised hand stops me from speaking.
“Let me finish.”
I shove the cigar back in my mouth to figuratively keep my mouth shut.
“I apologize for making it seem like I did not respect your marriage to Lilah. I would like a chance to explain myself a little better. But I am also going to take responsibility that the blame falls onto my shoulders. I need to respect that you are an adult. Not just my little brother. You’re right.” He takes another puff of his cigar. “I haven’t been acting like your president when it comes to you. And for that, I apologize. I still see you as a kid, and I am going to try my best to fix that.”
I nod, accepting his apology.
“As far as the Lilah thing, I’ve just always had a hard time when it comes to you going to prison. That shouldn't have been you, Ringer. You should havenevergone to prison. I’m your big brother. I’m supposed to protect you. I should have fought harder. Got you a better lawyer. I should have sent someone else, a prospect, to the party with her. You were supposed to have such a good life.” Ghost looks away from me when his voice cracks. “After Mom died, I promised myself I would make sure you had the best life. When you got arrested and they sentenced you to eight years, I blamed myself every day. I never blamed Lilah. She just somehow got mixed up in all of this.”
He scrubs his free hand over his bald head. “When you came home from Vegas and told me and Dad you and Lilah got married, I panicked. Not for the reason that you’re thinking. Maybe I said things that hinted towards it, I don’t know.” He shrugs. “But honestly, I was scared. I ran into Michael the day before, and he was sniffing around, no doubt trying to rile me up since he has to know you’re out. But also because it would fucking kill me to see you get hurt when I just got you back. I would’ve reacted the same way had it been Lilah or literally anyone else.”
“Why do you think Lilah is going to hurt me?”
“Let me ask you this. If Lilah told you tomorrow she wanted a divorce, or she would’ve told you then that she wanted an annulment, what would you have done?”
My gut twists in hurt and anger just at the thought, and I know my face must show it.
Ghost points at me. “Exactly. I’ve watched you go through two absolutely horrible things in your life, Ring. First, when Mom died, I held you while you sobbed yourself to sleep forweeks.And then I watched as the tears dropped down your face in that courtroom when you were sentenced. I didn’t even get a chance to console or support you then. They ripped you away from me before I had the chance. I don’t ever want to see you like that again.”
“You can’t protect me from everything, Ghost.”
“Probably not. But I’m sure as hell never going to stop trying, Emmett.” His solemn stare tears at my heart.
Ghost and I were probably closer than most other brothers once upon a time, but we weren’t big on talking through our feelings. Had he just told me how he felt after Vegas, this entire thing could have been avoided. But he isn’t all to blame. I could have handled this entire thing differently as well.
“Aside from Dad, and hell, probably more than him, you are the only fucking person on this earth that I love. Yes, I love this club. But there is not one single thing that I wouldn’t do to make sure that you are happy in this life, Ring. And I truly am sorry that the last few months have been so fucked up because of me.”
“Lilah’s struggling with all this. She blames herself, and hell, up until twenty minutes ago, I really thought it was because of her too. I love her, and honestly, I would choose her if it came to it.”
Ghost’s face falls, and he takes a deep breath. “I’ll need to fix that. I would never expect you to choose. And the fact that you would choose her means all the more. I’m happy you have her, Ring.”
I nod. “Even if she hurts me?”
“I won’t want to, but I’ll hold you while you hurt for any fucking reason, Ring.”
“Thanks, Booger.”
Ghost rolls his eyes with a smile. “Fuck off.”
I chuckle, relaxing back in my chair while playing with the cigar in my fingertips. “I saw your pinkies in church.”
He sighs. “I don’t even fucking realize it anymore.”
