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Butterflies erupt in my belly. Growing up in the club, everyone always had my back because of my dad’s position. But something about holding the title of an ol’ lady,his ol’ lady,has my heart constricting. I smile at him and nod.
ten
Lilah
“Married!”my Dad’s voice bellows as I shrink into the chair at his dining room table.
I curse myself for deciding it was a good idea to tell our dads separately instead of together. In hindsight, together would’ve been better.
“What in the fuck were you thinking, Lilah? He just got out of prison!”
“I was drunk-”
“That’s not a fucking excuse, and you damn well know it! You are twenty-fucking-three, for God’s sake,” Dad interrupts, dropping into the chair across the table from me and lowering his head into his hands. He scrubs the heels of his palms into his eye sockets. “Jesus Christ.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“What the hell would your Nana say if she were here?” he asks, his voice croaking with emotion.
I rear back as if he slapped me across the face, and tears leak from my eyes. I straighten my spine before answering. “I think she’d be disappointed, but she also knew I’ve loved him for the better half of my life.”
“Fuck, Lilah. I know that. Fuck, weallknow that. But that doesn't make it right.” He shakes his head in denial. “He’s been out of prison for, what, two weeks?”
I don’t answer. When my dad gets into this kind of lecture mode, he isn’t asking for answers. He wants to get everything off his chest, and then he’ll be open for discussion at the end. He’s all I have left. If I lose him over this, I will be devastated.
“You’re my only kid, Lilah. I didn’t even get to be there or walk you down the aisle. Or give you away? Fuck!” he yells with so much emotion that it breaks my heart, pounding his fist on the wooden table.
“What the fuck is Bones going to say?” he asks in frustration.
I continue to stare at the knick in the table in front of me as he rants. He’s no longer yelling, but I almost think it would be better if he did. Instead, the pain in his voice has my heart threatening to rip into two.
When he hasn’t said anything for a while, I drag my blurry gaze back to his, wiping my cheeks with my wrist.
“Do you still love him?” he asks softly.
I shrug, sniffling. “I don’t know, Daddy. But we’re going to find out.”
“What does that mean, baby girl?”
“It was a drunken bet,” I laugh, shrugging again. “Ringer bet on the roulette table and said he was buying a ring if he won, and well, he won.”
I pull my purse across the table, take the diamond ring from the side pocket, and slide it onto my finger. It’s wild that it’s only been on my hand consciously for a little over seven hours, but when it was in my purse, my finger felt naked. Now I feel whole again.
I hold my hand out for my dad to look at it, and satisfaction bubbles in my belly as he whistles while checking it from all angles.
“How much did he win? Goddamn.”
I let out a small giggle and pull my hand back. “I’m told a pretty penny.”
“And it looks like every penny was spent on that thing,” Dad says with approval. “You are worth every damn penny of that, Lilah. I hope you know that.”
“I try to be, Daddy. I try.”
He chuckles, still staring at the rock on my hand.
“We decided we’re only telling you and Bones for now, so I would appreciate it if you kept it hush-hush until we’re ready.”
“Of course, baby girl, but why?”
