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I love you.
The whisper echoed through his head as he crunched his way over the gravel drive to his truck, slumping against the driver’s seat with a grunt. How the hell had he not seen this coming? With all the time they’d spent together, it should’ve been a foregone conclusion, yet Carly’s declaration had blindsided him. Of course, it had scrambled everything inside of him on the way, tossing up feelings he’d lodged so deeply within himself, he’d sworn they’d never see the light of day.
Right now, they might as well be laundry on the line. Even worse, Carly had clearly wanted to talk about it when he returned to bed, but he’d gently cut her off, feigning exhaustion. The emotion in her eyes as she’d hesitated to lie down next to him had nearly undone Jackson right there on the bed sheets, but he knew better than to go down that path. Besides, what could he possibly say?
I’d love you, too, only it would be hazardous to your health?
The way Carly had looked with her eyes closed against the spray of the shower last night had stirred up a desire in him that had felt damn near forceful. In that moment, he’d have done anything—anything—to have her. Need that intense was dangerous, and it was only getting stronger.
Leaving her was the only way to save them both.
* * *
“I am such an idiot.”
Carly squeezed her eyes shut over her coffee cup, propping her elbows on the table in front of her as she dropped her head into her hands.
“Sweetie, telling Jackson how you feel doesn’t make you an idiot.” Sloane tipped her head at Carly, the sympathy on her face plain. Carly pushed back in her chair, surveying La Dolce Vita’s dining room. It was empty except for the kitchen staff in the back and Gavin tallying receipts and checking inventory behind the bar, and Carly breathed a sigh of relief at the few hours of down time she had between the rush of lunch and dinner during Saturday service.
“Still. I can’t go falling in…” Carly trailed off, lowering her voice to a whisper. “I can’t go feeling like that about somebody. Look at what happened last time I trusted someone with my heart.”
But Sloane was ready with an eye-roll of epic proportions. “Come on. You’re not seriously comparing Travis with Jackson, are you? It’s apples and oranges, and the apples are rotten to the core.”
“Well, the oranges could still break my heart, Sloane. And I don’t think I could take it again.” The admission made Carly want to bury herself deep in her kitchen indefinitely, and she crossed her arms over her chest to cover her sigh. She’d sworn she’d never put herself in a situation like this again. Yet here she was, with everything on the line.
“Carly.” Sloane leaned in, pausing before her voice softened over her next words. “Have you stopped to think that maybe Jackson is your swan?”
“Yes!”screamed her heart. But the rest of her couldn’t let the word past her lips.
“I don’t know.” Carly’s voice trembled, and Sloane slid from her seat to put her arms around Carly in a tight hug. “Nothing ever felt like this with Travis, you know? Not even when I caught him cheating red handed and knew everything was over. My heart never felt like this. I just…I…”
“It wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world,cucciola.” Sloane smoothed Carly’s braid, and although she did her best to fight them, tears heated beneath her eyelids.
“It would if he doesn’t love me back,” she whispered. He’d made it clear he didn’t want anything other than a casual relationship. He didn’t do serious.
Sloane gave her a squeeze before pulling back to look at her reassuringly, and Carly was shocked to see her friend’s eyes also rimmed with tears. “Oh, honey. After everything he did for you last week with yourmama? Anybody with two eyes and half a brain can see he’s nuts about you.”
“Yeah, but just because he helped me out when I needed it doesn’t mean he’s my egret…swan…love-of-my-life-bird-man,” Carly argued, wiping her face with the back of her hand.
Sloane snorted, surprisingly graceful. “At least you’re getting the idea.”
Carly blew out a shaky sigh. “Why can’t this be easy, like following a recipe?”
“The good stuff is never easy. But if he’s your swan, you’ll figure it out.”
Carly managed a soft laugh, even though her heart wasn’t all the way in it. “How’d you get so smart about all this love stuff, anyway?”
“I write fucking romance novels, sweetie. I’m making it up as I go.”
The deep rumble of a throat being cleared startled the two women from their friendly embrace, and Carly looked up to see her restaurant manager shifting his weight uncomfortably in front of their table.
“Sorry to interrupt, chef. But there’s a phone call from New York on line two.” Gavin’s eyes shifted to Sloane, lingering for a second before settling back on Carly, his seriousness never wavering.
“Oh, God. Is it my brother?” Carly jerked out of her chair, but Gavin stepped in with a quick shake of his head.
“No, no. It’s someone calling from Gracie’s? He said it’s urgent that he speak with you, otherwise I’d have taken a message, since you’re, ah…obviously in a personal meeting.” He gestured awkwardly to Sloane, who fixed him with a lifted brow before turning to Carly.
“It’s got to be Travis.”
