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Prologue
The knotin my stomach loosened as the verdict was read off. The head juror continued with the remaining charges, but I only heard one word.
Guilty. Guilty.
Guilty.
I was free. After five, long, terrorizing years, I was free. I almost cried out of relief, but I refused to let him see me cry again.
“You little bitch!”
My head jerked up. Several law enforcement officials attempted to restrain Gideon while he fought and struggled against their hold.
His gaze burned with hatred and spittle flew from his mouth. “Don’t think you’re going to get away from me. You can try to run, but you’ll never be able to hide. No matter how long it takes, I’ll find you.”
I barely heard the judge bang his gavel and demand order in the court. I couldn’t look away from Gideon. His threats sent terror racing through me, but I held my head high. I refused to be cowed. I clasped my trembling hands in my lap and prayed I didn’t puke. Finally, he was restrained and removed, his screams echoing throughout the court room, the noise continuing to ring in my ear.
Long after everyone left, I remained sitting there, my entire body buzzing with a weird sort of energy. I knew what it was.
With shaking hands, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the small orange bottle. After several attempts, I finally got the lid off, dumped out a few white pills, popped them in my mouth, and swallowed. Eventually, my heart rate slowed, and I could breathe.
Quietly, I slipped out of my seat and made my way to the shit hole where I crashed on occasion. I took a final look around, picked up the backpack I’d shoved full of everything I owned, and headed to the bus station to start a new life.
Chapter 1
Gina
Acid churned in my stomach— again— when I stepped through the door of Eden. I breathed in the comforting scent, hoping to push back the anxiety I’d been feeling since I hung up the phone earlier tonight. It barely helped, and tomorrow I was going to have to not only make an appointment to see Madeline, but also check in with Sonia. The sensation was only exacerbated by the fact that a certain someone was bound to be inside. Some nights I could handle being in the same room as him, but other nights, when beaten-back memories rose to the surface, I chewed Tums like candy.
It was better than the alternative, though.
“Evening, Gina,” Philip greeted me from his position near the entrance, his massive build and enviable shoulder length locks giving him the look of a Norse Viking.
I sent him a wan, forced smile in return while I shrugged out of my jacket. It was the best I could muster. “Hey.”
He laid a gentle hand on my arm. “Are you okay? You seem off tonight.”
I rearranged my features. “Just a small headache. Didn’t drink enough coffee today. Nothing a good flogging session won’t fix.”
Philip chuckled, which meant I’d succeeded in fooling him. He gave my arm a comforting squeeze. It was the kind of man he was. “I hope it helps.”
“Thanks.” I threw the word over my shoulder as I disappeared down the long hallway leading to the main playroom.
The volume of the music coming from the speakers grew the closer I got, and my steps slowed. The burning in my belly amplified. Right before I entered the public space, I stopped completely, closed my eyes, and counted to ten. Then I steeled my spine and moved forward with the confidence I’d been faking for a year now. It was becoming more taxing every day, and I felt ninety-six rather than twenty-six. I scanned the room looking for my friend, boss, and fellow submissive, Bridget, but stopped short when my eyes landed onhim.
Leonides Xavier Marshall.
A boy I loved, once upon a time, but a man I’ve hated for half my life.
He turned his head, as though feeling my gaze, and his eyes collided with mine. I didn’t need to be any closer to know they were gray like the darkening sky right before a storm. As always, his stare held me hypnotized until my brain caught up, and I remembered why I shouldn’t be looking at him. I turned my back, my vision unfocused.
Blinking away the haze, I went back to searching for my friend. After a couple rounds of patrolling the floor, I gave up, settled onto a couch, and attempted to join the conversation, but I didn’t have the energy. Soon, it didn’t matter, because, one by one, everyone disappeared, and I was left alone with my thoughts.
I wasn’t looking forward to an unplanned session with Madeline. I’d been doing so well with handling my anxiety until these damn phone calls started, but moving up my appointment—by weeks—only proved how much I’d lied to myself.
I don’t know how long I sat there.
“Okay, spill it.”
