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It was softening, conforming to fit this new addition inside of it.
My husband.
Once he was in, it was just like in his world. He would never be out.
This change was big, though, and there was a lot of fear in letting go of past hurts and let downs, but when I looked at him, I was never more certain in my life of this one thing:
He was worth the gamble.
Maybe some would say worth the heartbreak that comes with love, because it’s just a part of it. But I had faith that as the years flew by, we would both be in it to win it.
Together, we were home.
I sighed and shielded my eyes from the blazing sun as I looked up at the new house Big bought for us. It was big, like his presence, but I loved that he gave the boys a room to share. They had plenty of space in the house for themselves, but that small thing would keep them close.
That was what I wanted for them. For all of us. Always.
My mom…that was a different story and always would be. When I looked at my situation from a different perspective, it was time that I accepted her for who she was: a woman who had not guarded her heart, but hardened it to the point that no one was allowed in.
Not even me.
It saddened me, always would, but there was great power in acceptance. And it softened my heart toward her some.
Again, I was thankful that Mr. Big wasn’t just a nickname for my husband. He was teaching me things in big ways and helping me make big changes in my life. Like seeing how I was on the road to becoming my mom.
This was a huge beginning for all of us, and for once, I couldn’t wait to see where life was heading.
“You coming, Leonora?”
I startled when Angelo came to stand next to me.
“In a minute. I’m just enjoying the view.” The house looked like it belonged in the Mediterranean, and the boys had been checking out the sea, aka, the pool.
“It’s nice. But I was okay living in our apartment.”
I turned to him and questioned his statement with the look on my face.
He shrugged. “As long as you’re there with us…it doesn’t matter. Like Big said. You’re our home.” He touched my hand, then followed behind Phoenix into the house.
I couldn’t move. All the fractures seemed like they were healing at once. The feelings behind his words. The courage it took for him to say them out loud…
It was the medicine I needed to heal.
“You okay, Aphrodite?”
Big’s voice snapped me out of it, and I flung my arms around his neck, pressing my body against his, burying my face in his neck. It took him off guard, because at first, he wasn’t sure where to set his hands. Then he pulled me to him and hugged me so tight, I almost couldn’t breathe.
Without a word, we separated some, but we were still close. I had to look up at him to meet his eyes. I realized he hadn’t been to work all day.
“Don’t you have a casino to run?”
“Not right now. This is my honeymoon.”
I laughed and wiped my eyes, even though I wasn’t crying.
He took my hand and started leading me to the hundred-car garage. “Where are we going?”
“For a ride.” He held his free hand up. “Lidia is in love with your brothers already. She’s even appointed herself Nonna Lidia. She’s teaching them how to make pizza as we speak.”
