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“Because I don’t think you can handle it,” he said. Like he was talking about the weather. Like he was talking about some basic math problem second graders had already memorized.
I jerked my head back. I shouldn’t have been surprised by his callus response but it still stung like a slap.
“How do you even know —“
“Master Grey talked to me about it last night,” he said.
I chewed my lip, glaring at the paved cement beneath my feet. “I’m on of the few strategic Elite —“
“It has nothing to do with your knowledge or ability in the strategic field,” he said.
“Then, what, you think I’m not strong enough?” I asked, and I hated the way my voice tremored when I asked. I shouldn’t care what he thought. Kazu never thought I was much of anything, if him ignoring me the majority of our training had anything to show for it. But the truth was, I did. I wanted him to respect me, to view me as capable, and it bothered me that I didn’t understand why he didn’t. I didn’t know what I could do to get him to change his mind.
“Something like that,” he replied.
I curled my fingers into tight balls by my sides. “If you think that, are you worried?” I asked. My voice lifted, and I realized I turned into some kind of banshee, a she-wolf everyone wrote off as having her cycles opposite the moon rather than with it. “Why do you think they’ll offer me a mission anyway?”
Kazu said nothing. His hands hung loose from his pockets, shoulders pushed down without a hint of tension. He glanced to his left, like he would rather be anywhere but here. And honestly? I would too. It wasn’t as though I had asked him to call us for some kind of training in the first place. Hell, I hadn’t even asked to be part of his team anyway.
“Why do you even call me?” I took a step forward. My wolf pushed against my insides, ready to pounce, to transform, to attack. Pride bristled in my chest like stepping through a viney patch of field, and I yearned for nothing more than to take out a machete and slice my way through it. “Why bring me to train if you don’t think I’m capable of anything?”
“I have an obligation –”
“And how little you oblige me,” I snapped, wrinkling my nose.
He sneered. “I didn’t ask you to be part of this team, Embyrlyn,” he said slowly. “I didn’t request your presence. I was assigned to you.”
“And you’ve been ignoring me ever since.”
“And maybe that’s the best thing,” he said.
I shook my head. “What does that even mean?” I asked. “You took Dade and Felix under your wing. You’ve taught them moves and countermoves, everything, to be more like you –”
“Maybe I don’t want you to be like me.” His words were soft but still just as chilly. It was only then that I realized there was some blue in his slate eyes. I hated that someone so damn beautiful could be so cruel. “Maybe someone like you can’t handle it, and you should just be aware of it now.” He glanced down, giving the length of me a long perusal, before meeting my eyes once more. “Don’t take the mission, if you know what’s best for you.”
“Oh, like you do,” I said. “You don’t even know me.”
“No,” he agreed. “And I’d like to keep it that way.”
Before I could bite back a retort, Felix emerged from the academy, a tray of food that steamed against the overcast sky in his hand. “Embyrlyn, I have your food,” he sing-songed. “The strawberries are so fresh! Do you know how they get fresh strawberries in December, because I don’t.”
By the time Felix got to me, Kazu had done one of his eerie disappearing acts. Felix shoved my food at me.
“Why does your face look like that?” he asked.
“Shut up, Felix,” I growled, grabbing my tray and plopping on a nearby bench.
I knew it wasn’t Felix’s fault that Kazu regarded me as little more than a nuisance. But I couldn’t quell the jealousy that tore through my body, even as I stuffed my mouth with amazing food.
I would take that mission. And I would be the absolute best at it. And Kazu would regret completely writing me off.
Embyrlyn
“So…did you hear about the new girl?”
Apparently, there was a new girl at the academy, and Felix couldn’t shut up about it. I didn’t particularly want to hear about it. While the academy didn’t often get new students, and even if the rumors were true and this one was a human, I had no interest in refocusing my determination to prove Kazu-sensei wrong than I did to check out a new girl. Even if Felix couldn’t stop talking about how pretty her yellow hair was and whether she’d date a shifter as a human.
“I thought you were seeing Misty,” I said during lunch, when I couldn’t stand any more of his blathering. I had barely touched the ham and swiss sandwich I grabbed, my mind too muddled with how I could improve myself. I knew it wouldn’t change my captain’s opinion of me, but still. I had to do something. Sitting around, waiting for inspiration had never been my thing, and if someone was going to ask me to go on a mission…
