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“You wanted to learn to lie effectively?”
She shrugged. “Most of the time, no. I’d like to be a good person. But…” She raised a finger. “There are times in life no one else is fighting fair, and those times, I end up being used if I’m not careful.” She stopped speaking for a moment, moving closer to him. “You’re teaching me how to fight. For me and for you too.”
Those words made him ache. “I’m turning you from a lovely woman into a degenerate.”
“Everyone lies on occasion. I’m just late to the ball.”
“I might ruin you, dragging you into rooms like this.”
“If that is being degenerate, then I absolutely want you to teach me more.”
His mouth opened and then closed as he tried to answer. It wasn’t a terrible point. “Liked my touch, did you?”
“I did,” she answered. “Are you going to disappear again?”
Part of him wanted to. He still wasn’t certain he was right for her. But he’d also not abandon her again. “No. But I would like to vehemently warn you that I am no good.”
“So… I should allow Kingsley to continue to pursue me then?”
Minx. “Oh, Red, are you trying to make me jealous? Because it is absolutely working.”
“Don’t call me Red.”
He sighed as he pulled her close. “I know sometimes I use the nickname when I don’t want to say your actual name, but I am honestly and sincerely obsessed with your hair. I can’t wait to see it undone.”
“Does that mean you’re not pushing me away?”
He shook his head. “I won’t. But if you choose to leave, I’ll let you go.”
Her hand came up to rest on his cheek, her fingers sliding over his rough skin. “If I was pushing you away, we’d not be here together.”
He let out a long breath, her body pressed to his, making him warm all over. “We need to talk about the future, I think.”
She nodded. “I agree. With the number of times we’ve been alone, we’re going to get caught. You’re right about that.”
It was true. Even with all his experience, someone was bound to catch them at some point. And it was obvious that their arrangement was no longer a temporary bargain of convenience.
But he still worried, deep in his heart, that he’d fail at change. He’d been a rake for so long, could he be the man Natalie needed? Was he actually capable?
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The next afternoon, Natalie sat next to Kingsley as he drove his carriage through Hyde Park. Her mother had insisted she attend this outing, sure that being seen with a marquess would only aid Natalie’s cause.
Since no one was about, Natalie had hardly seen the point, but she’d agreed anyway. She had her own agenda and it involved telling the marquess that she was not interested in him as a suitor.
Despite his assertion that they had a connection, or perhaps because of it, Natalie had realized she felt nothing for the marquess.
She neither liked nor disliked him. In fact, the more she considered her feelings toward him, the odder that fact was. She usually had some opinion on people she met. Why was her response to him so…indifferent?
Regardless, it was time to be honest. Her relationship with Somersworth was progressing. She still wasn’t certain it would lead to marriage, but she knew that as long as the two of them were so intimately engaged, she had no room for the marquess.
There was a part of her that still worried that Ethan would back away again, but she’d determined to be brave and see this through.
She gave the marquess a side glance, her breath holding in her lungs as she considered what she might say. He took them over several well-trodden paths, the speed making conversation difficult, which suited her just fine.
As they neared the end of the park, Kingsley slowed the carriage. “I wasn’t moving too quickly for you, was I?”
“Not at all, my lord. I quite enjoyed it.”
