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“Well, then,” Rollick says. “You should test your limits. See how much pressure you need to apply when it comes to beings with some supernatural defenses—how quickly you can affect them—that sort of thing.”
I can’t restrain a shudder. “What? I’m not going to hurt—”
He holds up his hand to stop my protest. “I’m not asking you to maim them. Freeze them in place. Feel out where the edge of your ability is, where you’d be able to hurt them. Give them a papercut—you’ve got your healer standing by. I’m sure they’ll recover just fine. And then you’ll be properly prepared when it really counts.”
My throat constricts. That’s why he wanted Jacob and Andreas to come along too—why Lance and Crag are here. Rollick expects me to aim my torturous shriek at them.
Every particle in my body balks at the idea. But I balk against refusing too.
I argued with the demon about testing my powers back when we were first traveling with him. My shaky control is part of the reason I wasn’t able to pull back from wrenching Billy apart in time to save him from those injuries.
Dominic won’t be able to heal the shadowkind men if I hurt them that badly. He helped Billy a little, but the shadowy essence that makes up their inner workings limited what his talents can do.
I can’t let that stop me. Shying away from the brutality inside me has never worked in my favor in the long run.
Do I want to rush into Balthazar’s fortress and watch the guys beside me cut down because I didn’t realize how forcefully I needed to project my power?
For all I know, I won’t be able to tackle fellow shadowbloods with my silent scream at all. It would be useful to know if I should go straight to using my voice. And at lower levels of power, I can simply lock people in place, before I get to the point of maiming them.
It’s not as if I can’t control it enough to make sure I don’t outrightkillanyone.
My teeth have gritted. I force them apart. “Fine. How do you think we should start?”
Rollick tips his head toward his shadowkind companions. “Why don’t you begin with these louts? Full shadowkind should be trickier than hybrids, and they’ll heal faster. You’ll have a better idea how to moderate yourself with your men afterward.”
A flicker of doubt crosses Lance’s face. “The scream—it doesn’t make peopledothings under your control, does it?”
“No,” I say quickly. “If it works, it’ll lock you in place so you can’t move, and I might do a little damage accidentally, but I can’t force you to walk or talk or anything.”
His momentary tension vanishes behind another grin. “All right, then.”
Crag squares his bulky shoulders, his voice a low rumble. “I’m ready.”
I wish I was. I inhale deeply and reach down to the vibration of energy that’s always inside me, if faint when I’m not angry.
It doesn’t take much to stir up the hunger for pain. I prod it with memories of the destruction I’ve seen on the news, of the murders Balthazar committed before my eyes and the ones he threatened.
The vicious, starving thing resonates up from my chest to the back of my mouth. But I’m not going to let it out that way, not if I don’t have to.
I hold myself rigidly under control, aware of my targets while I train my focus, and hone my thoughts into the thinnest possible shriek that I aim at the figures in front of me.
With mortals—humans or animals—I think it’d be enough to freeze them in place. The two shadowkind men only twitch at my efforts. Lance tilts his head, proving he’s not frozen yet.
So Rollick was right. It is going to take more oomph for my powers to affect shadowkind.
I don’t know if we’ll encounter any at Balthazar’s fortress, but I need to be ready either way.
My muscles tensing, I push my silent scream harder and louder inside my head. Ramping it up by careful degrees, hoping I won’t accidentally make too large a leap.
Nothing happens.
My eyes snap shut of my own accord. Ifeelthe shadowkind across the room from me, two solid presences, and shriek with an extra jolt of might.
Finally, the scream connects. My mind floods with the awareness of their bodies, every bit of bone and flesh I could break to deal out the agony my monstrous side craves. Just a sip—
It happens so fast I can’t catch it in time. The knuckle of a little finger cracks.
I wrench my attention away and yank my eyelids open to see Lance holding up his hand, eyeing it with an air of curiosity even though his jaw has tightened. His smallest finger juts at an unnatural angle.
