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Prologue
Four Years Ago
Fuck.I couldn’t believe I was actually doing this.
“Is this the King’s bedroom?” Her eyes were wide and sparkling under the light of the chandelier. All I could do was smile at her surprise. She had no idea this was my keep. She had no idea we were standing in my bedroom. “Calomyr, we cannot be here!”
“But we can,” I answered, watching her eyes scan the room once again, completely unaware that the paintings on the walls were mine, the fine woven rugs were mine, the blades that hung above the fireplace… All mine.
“But what if–”
I kissed her, because every word she spoke pushed me one step further back from the edge, and I needed to jump. The cold reality of what I had to do was unavoidable, and my resolve was faltering. I couldn’t lose my nerve. It had to be tonight.
“What if we just enjoy it?” I whispered, severing myself from her only far enough to see her bite down on her lip. Fuck. My cock stiffened at the sight of it, and I felt her go weak for a moment. I couldn’t keep back the groan that formed in my throat. “You bite that lip, and it makes me want to–”
Focus.
I pulled her to me again, fighting to keep my mind on my task as I kissed her. But fuck, she was melting into me already. She smelled like sweet oranges and rosewater, and I could feel myself getting high on it. “I was tired of being quiet. I won’t have to cover your mouth here,” I breathed as I lifted her. My hands squeezed her ass and she wrapped her legs around me, a soft moan escaping her lips. Saints, I loved the noises she made for me, and I knew they wouldn’t be stopping any time tonight. “The Keep is ours for the night.”
“Cal, this is too much, this is–”
“Petra.” My breath came too quickly and I fought for control. I didn’t want to kill her any more now than I did when Castemont first suggested this plan, that I get close enough to the Daughter of Katia to kill her and keep her from burning the world at her hand. I closed my eyes, leaning my forehead against hers, and nodded to myself.
She may not be a queen, but tonight, she’d die as mine.
I fought with every ounce of strength I had to keep my will from being swallowed up by those autumn eyes as I pulled back to stare at her. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to fuck you in the King’s bed now.”
She gasped, her want was almost tangible. I knew what those words would do to her. “As you wish.” Her body heated against me and her hair fell around her shoulders as I laid her on the bed. Looking down at her, seeing her ready and willing, her eyes nervously looking around the room, afraid to be caught, the slight smile, the blush on her cheeks…
This. This is what I’d remember until my dying breath. Her, here, waiting for me.
It was time.
I fought to give her the smile she deserved as I stood above her, pulling my tunic over my head, using the split second the fabric covered my face to reinforce my will. And I’m glad I did, because when I looked down at her again, at the hunger that lined her face as she stared at me…
She could so easily be my undoing.
My belt and sword found the floor, but my eyes flicked to the bed for a tiny moment, reminding myself where the dagger was tucked under the mattress. It was a fight to keep my breathing even as dread rose in my chest. I leaned over her, my thumbs running up and down her neck as I stared down at her. “You are my Queen,” I whispered, “and I’d like to treat you as such.”
I knew that fire lurked somewhere deep within her, but in that moment, I thought to myself that just a look was enough to incinerate me right here, right now. Then she dropped her head to one side and pulled my thumb into her mouth, grazing her teeth across my skin.Saints. I let my eyes roll back in my head as I lost myself in the moment, pressing my thumb further into her mouth. Need throbbed through me as I trailed my thumb down her body, playing with the hem of her tunic as my other hand found its way to her waistband.
She pushed me away suddenly, and I froze for a second. Did she somehow know what I was going to do? But she drove me back to the bed and slung her tunic to the floor, her pants quickly following.
Petra stood over me in all her divinity, and I realized then that if she commanded it, I’d make sure all the stars in the sky bowed to her, along with every tree in every forest and every peak of every mountain if that’s what she wanted.
But her command tonight was much simpler. “Off,” she ordered, pointing to my pants. “Your Queen commands it.”
I can’t lose my nerve.
I did as I was bid then dropped to my knees before her. Panic settled into my body as I convinced myself to keep going. The feel of her skin on my hands, the taste of her in my mouth… I tried to commit it all to memory as I looked up at her, at the woman who, according to Castemont, would one day burn the world and everyone in it. She looked down at me like I was the answer to a lifelong prayer.
In the bedroom that she didn’t know was mine, I imagined, for just a moment, that I didn’t have to kill her. That’d we’d found each other in this life by accident, not by Castemont’s design. I imagined, for just a moment, that she was truly my Queen, and I her King, as we made love high above the country we ruled together.
I was high on the thought of it, but shame quickly rushed in. All the color in the room turned gray as I clung to this final moment here, with her. “I could worship you forever,” I whispered. I wasn’t lying.
“Worship me later,” she answered. “Your Queen would like to be fucked now.”
For what was to be the last time, I did as she commanded. I grabbed her by the waist and tossed her to the bed like she was nothing. I couldn’t look her in the eye any longer. I couldn’t bear the thought of seeing her hurt. I flipped her on her belly and angled her hips up. “As you wish, my Queen.” My voice was dangerously close to breaking as I quickly retrieved the dagger from beneath the mattress and placed it beside me. She couldn’t see it, but it gleamed in the low light, relentlessly taunting me.
