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Solise’s head whipped to me, confusion on her face. Nell and Whit went still.
“His name isn’t Miles Landgrave,” I said quietly. “His name is Tobyas Vic Myrin, and he died thirteen years ago.”
Chapter 36
As Miles’ eyes slowly fluttered open, Belin explained the identity of the Lieutenant. Solise’s face remained stoic and unsurprised, as if Belin finding his brother alive more than a decade after he died wasn’t at all shocking. Whit and Nell on the other hand… A minute didn’t pass without a gasp.
I thanked the Saints that Miles was lucid enough to be a part of the conversation, and thanked them again when he pushed himself to sit up. “We need to get moving.” He reached for a twig and began outlining a map in the dirt, only half-conscious but always the Lieutenant. “This is the shortest route from the edge of the city to the barracks. We’ll cross the fewest guard stations,” he said, drawing a line across the makeshift map of Taitha. “Kauvras will most likely have guards here, here, and here.” He circled the locations, staring hard at the outlines in the dirt. “Those are the three major landmarks we’ll need to cross to get to the barracks.”
I followed the route he’d drawn out and tried to ignore Belin’s intense gaze that had been on me since he realized his brother would be okay. “Are the barracks large enough to hold as many Vacants as Kauvras has now?” I asked.
“No, which means there will most likely be Vacants in regular buildings — homes, shops, anywhere he can put them. But I think it’d be a good idea to start at the barracks since there'll be a large number of them in one area. Easier for you to…” Miles trailed off. I didn’t need him to finish the sentence. “We’ll enter the city here.” He marked a spot between the Taithan castle and the edge of the leechthorn fields. “As soon as we make it to the barracks, it’s all yours.
My stomach soured further at the thought of all those people, of who was in those barracks. I tried to push the thoughts away, but they festered like Miles’ arrow wound, hot and acrid.
“Petra,” Solise said softly when she saw my face. “It’s going to be okay.”
“My mother,” I whispered. A tear slipped from my eye and I didn’t bat it away. No one said anything. I blinked the tears back as best I could, my eyes falling once again on the map as I cleared my throat. “And then we go to the castle?”
“By that point, Kauvras will know what’s going on. That’s your chance to do what you want with him,” Miles answered evenly. Belin tensed beside me.
What I wanted with him? What did I want from Kauvras? An apology? An explanation? His life?
Miles looked at me expectantly, in the way I was getting used to. I looked around to see the same look on everyone else’s faces, too. I had to ignore Belin’s once again, or else I’d lose my nerve. “Alright,” I muttered. “Rest up. We move at nightfall.”
? ? ?
The eeriness of a silent, torch-lit Taitha permeated my bones. The castle loomed overhead, still standing but badly scorched, keeping a wary eye on her empty streets. Houses and shops showed evidence of the violence that had torn through Taitha after the wedding, and bits of broken glass had been hastily swept to the side. Every window in the city, whether shattered or intact, was pitch black.
The soldiers that patrolled the streets were masked, each in full Cabillian armor, each outfitted with a sword at each hip and two more across their backs. I swallowed hard, the nervousness bubbling in my throat impossible to ignore.
Solise and Miles stayed back at the pond, despite the Lieutenant's protests. Belin’s hulking figure stood in front of me, peeking out from an alleyway into the streets. I eyed him, trying to keep the bitterness and resentment and longing from intertwining and wrapping around my core. I needed to focus. Nell and Whit waited behind me for the signal.
All at once, Belin gave a quick nod and Nell and Whit sprung forward, their movements lithe and exact as they lunged from behind to split two patrolling soldiers’ necks from ear to ear. I cringed, my stomach tightening at the sound of their bodies hitting the cobblestones, their lifeblood splattering. But there was no time to cower.
We clung to shadows as we made our way to the barracks. It almost felt like I was back in Inkwell, doing my best to be a part of the scenery so I could steal jewelry or fabric to sell, hoping to feed my family. Hiding came naturally, and I felt myself sink back into my old ways of being invisible. Back and forth across the streets we moved, patrolling Cabillian soldiers falling left and right as they died, unaware it was their former comrades that ended their lives. Every movement, every swipe of steel against skin injected anguish and dread deeper into my very soul.
I summoned the heat within me, finding it easier this time. It smoldered as I told myself over and over again that I could do this. But something else was happening within me too, like a slow-moving storm forming on the horizon.
Belin turned around and I froze under his gemstone stare.Dammit. Even in the throes of misery I was incapacitated by him. I forced myself to break the eye contact. His gaze flashed to Whit and Nell, the three of them exchanging a nod.
My stomach roiled with nausea as I fought against my instincts to run. I would walk in, light the place up, and leave. I didn’t want to think about who was in there, didn’t want to stick around to hear anyone scream. Then I’d do the same to every building on my way to the castle. Or at least I’d try, and pray to the Saints that my power didn’t run out.
I was going to vomit.
All at once we were moving, the four Cabillian soldiers guarding the barracks taken by such surprise that the fight wasn’t a fight at all. Four more bodies weighed on my conscience, and my companions stood watch as I pulled open the narrow wooden door of the barracks.
Buckets of clean water lined the front wall. They’d been forced to drink frombuckets, like fucking dogs. Only a few torches lined the interior of the massive, dusty structure. Thousands and thousands of tiny cots were stacked three-high, their surfaces uneven with leechthorn-crazed inhabitants as far as I could see. The chamber was completely still and completely silent. I heard not a single breath, not a single rustle of bedsheets, only my own heartbeat and the voice in my head.
I took a deep breath, stepping forward as I burrowed into the sorrow that stoked the flames inside me.A quick death.That was the mercy these people deserved.
I could do it. I had to do it.I had to do it.
Something tugged at me then, some invisible thread tied around a rib. It tightened and yanked me forward. I tried to fight against it, tried to focus on my flames, but instead I found myself walking to the first row of cots, looking down at a small, blonde-haired woman. She looked peaceful as she slept, though I knew that the moment she woke, all traces of peace would dissipate like smoke in the wind.
But still, I let that thread tug me, let my hand reach out to push the hair from the woman’s face, only to be greeted with a familiar profile.
My mother. Because of course.
