AllFreeNovel
Share Us
"I am really sorry."
"It happens. It came with the job, I understood what I'd signed up for,” Declan says with a shrug.
"You sound like a true soldier,"I say with a smile.
Declan looks up at me and smiles wanly.
“I like to think that sometimes.”
"You're modest," I mutter and chuckle as I take another sip of my mocktail.
I am enjoying Declan's company and the mundane conversation we are having. We both seem to get each other without having to say much.
"So, why did you break up with Allard?" he finally asks.
I take another huge sip of my drink, noting that it is nearly finished.
"Do you need a refill?"
"Yes, please," I reply.
Declan beckons a passing waitress over and requests a refill for both our drinks.
"You'll be driving," I cannot help but point this out.
I'd expect him to argue that he could handle two glasses of alcohol like the men I have gone on dates with always have, but his eyes widen.
"You're right. I'd better order a glass of water," he says as he calls the waitress back to change his order. As the waitress moves away again, Declan looks expectantly at me. "Or..." he starts when I don't say anything.“Is it something that you would rather not talk about?"
"No, I can. Allard and I had wanted different things, I'd realized, as we continued in the relationship that our polar opposite personalities, which I thought made our relationship unique, were actually damaging. I'd begun, instead of loving him, to tolerate him. I stayed longer in the relationship because I am a people-pleaser and didn't want to hurt his feelings by telling him that it was no longer working."
"It will appear that you did eventually tell him," Declan says, pointing out the obvious.
"Yes," I answer with a smile. "I eventually had to because I couldn't continue to live a lie. Look how that turned out."
Declan shakes his head.
"No matter how you think of it, I think it's commendable that you eventually braved up and decided to end it. You were selfish in that regard, that's the best kind of self-love - Putting yourself first."
I look up at Declan and give him a big smile. I have never casually had a drink with someone and entertained a deep conversation such as this. Declan and I might truly be getting acquainted properly for the first time, but I am enjoying every second of this. I am a little glad that I did not turn him down.
"What about you? Do you have any crazy ex-wives?"
Declan chuckles.
"Fortunately, no. My ex-wife and I are legally divorced, I know that she isn't secretly pining after me. She has long since moved on, which is honestly what she deserves. Marriage with me had seemed to hold her back, I’m glad that she is flying solo."
"It’s very rare for a man to admit that the reason why his marriage crashed was his fault," I tell Declan honestly.
"Oh, I know it is. There would be no gain in lying about that. I had been away for most of the time, always on deployment. It was thrilling, I enjoyed every second of it."
I look Declan over again, concluding that he's this ripped due to all that fighting and training he's probably undergone.
"I did miss my family," he continues, his voice is growing slightly distant. "I came home as often as we were allowed, which was fewer than three times a year. Amelia endured all of that and raised our son alone."
I shake my head as I continue to look at him.
"To ride the clouds of your dreams, you sometimes need to give something up."
