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Caleb’s chest twisted. He knew he was feeling something big and intimate for Bodhi, but he didn’t know how far he wanted it to go. He wasn’t dealing with heartbreak as much as he was dealing with learning to change his daily routine now that Cameron wasn’t around. But Bodhi was young, and his feelings were tender, and Caleb was a part of the reason why.
Just because he wanted Bodhi didn’t mean he deserved him. And it didn’t mean he’d be good for him.
Part of him wanted to ask to talk to Hudson, but the man was obsessively private about his feelings, and while he’d probably do it as a favor to Peyton, Caleb didn’t want to put him in that position.
“Do you want me to ask him why he decided to take a chance with me?” Peyton asked.
Caleb shook his head. “No. I think I need to figure out what I want first.”
“Smart.”
Caleb laughed and slapped a hand on his face, groaning as he dragged it down. “Yeah, for once this week.”
Peyton pulled a face that was full of pity. It stung, but it was no less than he deserved. Tipping his head back, he rested one hand on his belly and made grabby fingers with his other, grinning when Peyton placed the box against his palm.
Caleb broke another piece of brownie off just as the door swung open, and he slammed the lid down, clutching the treats close to his chest with his forearm. “I’m not sharing.”
Wren’s eyes went wide, then he ran over and yanked Peyton to his feet, hugging him tight as though he hadn’t seen him for months instead of weeks. “I didn’t know you were coming over.”
Peyton smiled softly as he broke away and sat back down, waiting for Luke and Wren to get settled. “I wanted to bring Caleb some feel better treats.”
Luke sat forward, looking far too eager. “Brownies? Like the ones you posted on IG?”
Caleb clutched the box tighter. “For me.I’mthe sad one.”
“You’re the asshole who also made Bodhi sad,” Luke stated.
Caleb closed his eyes and sighed, opening them again only when Luke tapped him on the leg. “I know,” he finally answered.
“Don’t be a dick,” Wren bitched at their friend. “Bodhi told us that you two hugged.”
Caleb’s face erupted into white-hot heat. “He told you?”
“Ravi told us,” Wren said.
Caleb couldn’t really be surprised. Every group of Deaf friends he ever had was worse at gossip than some Victorian knitting circle. But he felt a pang in his gut because he wasn’t sure how Bodhi would feel about everyone knowing. They hadn’t talked since that night, and Caleb was determined not to cross any more lines with him.
“I realized I was being a terrible boss and an even worse friend,” Caleb said, setting the brownies between himself and Peyton so he could continue to guard them.
Peyton rolled his eyes and stood up, waving a hand in his eyeline. “Can I use your kitchen so these two will stop staring at me like I kicked a puppy?”
Caleb shooed him off, too tired to care what anyone did in his home. Peyton gave him a smile that made him feel marginally better, then ambled off. Caleb carefully looked between his friend and brother, and it was obvious the pair of them weren’t going to drop it.
And maybe that was how he needed to start properly atoning. Not just acknowledging it to Bodhi, but to everyone else who had stood by as a witness.
“I know that my bias gets a little intense sometimes,” he started, and Wren’s face flickered through an old emotion Caleb hadn’t seen in years. He chewed on the inside of his cheek until it stung. “I thought I was mostly past it, but something about Bodhi triggered it.”
“You know it’s not his fault,” Wren said. “Their grandparents…”
“I know,” Caleb interrupted quickly.
Luke sat forward, looking concerned. “I don’t. What about their grandparents?”
Caleb swallowed uncomfortably, but Wren was quick to answer. “You should probably bring it up with the twins. It’s not a nice story, and they were cruel.”
Luke’s eyes widened, his face understanding first, then angry. “They’re so sweet. How the hell could anyone be mean to them?”
“I know,” Caleb signed, feeling miserable. “And I was such an ass.”
