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At that, Caleb couldn’t help an incredulous laugh. “Yes. I’m falling in love with you.”
Bodhi’s cheeks went ruddy. “Love?”
Caleb nodded. “I know it’s soon and I’m not trying to move too fast. But I started falling the second I let myself open up to you. I wish I could take back the last several months.”
Bodhi shook his head, and when Caleb frowned, he actually laughed. “You were with Cameron. And after that, you were hurt and angry. If you tried to say this to me before, I would have thought you were using me to feel better.”
Caleb flinched, but only at himself because what Bodhi was saying was absolutely true. Caleb might have come to that conclusion, too. And granted it was only a few weeks since Cameron had dropped the bomb on their so-called relationship, it was enough time for him to realize he hadn’t been in love with him for years.
If ever.
“I’m afraid,” Bodhi repeated as Caleb’s attention moved back to Bodhi. “Promise me something.”
Caleb nodded his head. “Anything.”
“If it ever starts to bother you that I don’t fit in…”
Caleb raised his hands in protest, but Bodhi shook his head and he dropped them.
“Signing will never be natural to me. Voice will never be natural to me. My head works different,” he tapped his temple with one finger. “So promise me if it ever becomes too much, you’ll let me know.”
Bodhi should have never had to ask him for that vow. Ever. He was starting to realize that in his attempt to distance himself from his parents and the shape they’d wanted to force him into, he’d gone too far. He’d set expectations for everyone else, not just himself.
And he’d hurt too many people he loved because of it.
“I promise, but please understand, sweetheart, that won’t ever happen. I need you,” he signed.
Bodhi’s eyes widened slightly. “Need.”
“Yes.Need,” Caleb repeated. He pushed away his untouched breakfast and stood up, pulling Bodhi to his feet and cupping his cheek. He kissed him, tasting the savory and salt from his tongue until they were both hard and a little breathless, then he pulled back far enough to say, “You make me a better person.”
Bodhi smiled up at him. “You make me feel safe.”
If it was possible for Caleb’s heart to shatter with affection, those words caused it.
* * *
Bodhi and Caleb resolutely ignored the smirks of everyone around them when they showed up with a couple of beach chairs, a cooler, and their hands clinging to each other. They were at a small stretch of beach only locals knew about, so they had the place mostly to themselves that Monday afternoon.
The sun was warm, the breeze was soft, and the ocean spray was refreshing as they set everything down and settled in. Bodhi immediately went to talk to his brother, and Caleb stretched out beside Jori who was sitting a few feet away from where Mila was sleeping, wrapped up in a hooded towel and tucked into her little travel chair.
Tapping his knee, Caleb held his hand out and Jori placed his palm over his friend’s fingers. “I’m in love.”
Jori threw his head back with a laugh. “I know. Literally everyone knows.”
Caleb bristled and smacked him on the bicep. “Can you just let me have this one?”
Jori’s grin didn’t fade, but he shrugged and motioned for him to go on.
“I’m in love with Bodhi.”
“So, itwasa pigtail pulling crush?” Jori asked.
Caleb flushed and shifted so he was in front of Jori, blocking everyone else from seeing what he was saying. It was hard enough to admit this to anyone, and he didn’t want an audience. “I don’t know. I think I was trying to make him hate me so I didn’t have to face how I felt, and how awful my relationship was at the time. I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for how I treated him back then.”
Jori quickly sobered, his expression falling. Behind his thick shades, Caleb could see Jori’s eyes moving rapidly back and forth. “Cameron deserves to have itchy balls for the rest of his life.”
Caleb chuckled, tapping three fingers on the back of Jori’s wrist to indicate he was laughing. “Yeah. And hot pillows. And scratchy sheets.”
