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Knowing him was a stretch, but Bodhi realized that since his shock had worn off, he was less stressed about doing this. His life felt different—sort of upside down and a little confusing, but he was happy.
God, that was the feeling, wasn’t it? Happiness? He was so much more than content now, and he was no longer afraid that if he was himself, he’d be abandoned.
He realized he was stimming after a second and stilled his hands, but Khai caught his gaze. “Don’t stop for me. Just tell me what you need and I’ll make it happen, okay?”
Bodhi didn’t tell him that he still didn’t want to draw attention to himself. He just nodded, then reached for his bag. “Thank you,” he said once he had the strap on his shoulder. “I’m still learning and it’s hard. But I’m glad you’re someone I know.”
Khai’s face did something complicated, and Bodhi braced himself for some stay-positive, you’ll get there speech. But instead, Khai just offered him a fist bump. “This should be fun.”
Bodhi grinned as their knuckles collided. “Yeah.” And he actually meant it.
* * *
Bodhi stretched out so far, his back bowed and his stomach clenched, and he was pretty sure he made a really bizarre noise. Not that it mattered. The only person in the room was Caleb and he was standing at the edge of the bed watching him with a fond expression.
Bodhi smiled shyly, then covered his face, moving his hands when Caleb tapped him. He was expecting conversation, but instead, he got Caleb’s body draped over his, mouth seeking kisses, hands dragging firm, hard lines over his ribs.
Bodhi groaned as Caleb slipped his tongue into his mouth to taste the remnants of their dessert.
“Sweet,” Caleb signed when he pulled back.
Bodhi smiled and touched the corner of Caleb’s mouth. His hand was curling into a shape before he was really aware of it, but when he noticed, he did nothing to stop it. “I love you.”
Caleb sucked in a breath, his eyes suddenly misty. “I love you.” He kissed Bodhi again—harder, deeper, more demanding. Bodhi felt his lover’s fingers curl around his wrist, then his hand was moved to the swell of Caleb’s ass. “I want you to fuck me,” Caleb signed when he’d pulled back far enough.
Bodhi blinked at him, then his whole body flushed when he realized what Caleb was asking. “Because I said I love you?”
“Because I’ve been thinking about it all week, and I didn’t want to pressure you, so I waited. You can say no. It won’t hurt my feelings,” Caleb added.
Bodhi didn’t believe him. But he did believe that Caleb wouldn’t take hurt feelings out on him ever again. Of course, none of that actually mattered. Bodhi had been feeling a low hum of want under his skin all day every time he thought about Caleb, and this seemed like the perfect way to sate it.
Especially now since Caleb’s touch was turning the low flame into a roaring blaze.
Bodhi let himself groan loudly so Caleb could feel it, and he rocked his erection against Caleb’s hip. “Please.”
Caleb’s eyes brightened. “Yes. Let me get lube and condoms.” And then he didn’t. Instead, he shifted his weight so he was kneeling over Bodhi, kissing him again while his hand wandered low to cup over his cock and balls. He let Bodhi hump against his palm, seeking friction, seeking pleasure.
Caleb groaned against Bodhi’s mouth before finally ripping himself back. He didn’t move away, though. He traced Bodhi’s kiss-swollen lips with the tip of his finger and just looked at him.
After a moment, Bodhi began to shift uncomfortably. “You’re making me feel strange.”
Caleb snapped out of it. “Sorry. You’re just so…” His hand hovered in the air between them, then he surged in and kissed Bodhi one last time before throwing his legs over the bed and standing. Bodhi rolled over, then sat up as he watched Caleb paw around the drawer before finally finding what he was looking for.
He dropped the lube and condom on the blanket, then stood between Bodhi’s legs, cupping his jaw with one hand, using the other to ask, “How do you want me?”
Bodhi grinned. “Isn’t that what I’m supposed to say?”
“Yes, but this will be another first time for you.” Caleb laughed and shrugged as he stepped closer, bracketing Bodhi’s thighs with his knees.
Bodhi couldn’t help himself from touching. He dragged his fingers from Caleb’s navel down the length of his cock. He watched it twitch, watched Caleb’s whole body move into it as he held the warm, heavy balls against his palm.
They were soft in places, coarse and hairy in others. He rolled them over his fingers before moving further between his legs. He pressed against the spot that always made him twitch, and he watched as Caleb’s whole body shifted like he was seeking more, and harder. Bodhi increased the pressure of his fingers until Caleb started to tap him on the shoulder.
“Too much.”
Bodhi pulled his hand away and scooted back, giving Caleb room to climb back onto the bed. “I’m afraid.”
Caleb, who was on all fours, dropped his ass on his feet to kneel. “Of what? Me?”
