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“Didn’t seem like I had much of a choice.”
Even as his words cut at my heart, I explain, “You seem in good shape. If you wanted to run away when I was in the bathroom, I bet you could have created quite a distance between us before I noticed.”
Tommy smirks. “Can you imagine that shit? You’d come out, and I’d be running away like a scared bitch.”
“But you wouldn’t really be scared, just disinterested.”
His smile disappears immediately. “Don’t put words in my mouth.”
I have a choice before me. I can simply nod and let Tommy get away with twisting what’s happening. Or I can stand up for myself.
If I were still in the midst of feeding a dream, I’d most definitely keep my mouth shut. The future was bound to be great, but I needed to wait and not rock the boat. All my usual lies.
However, my shop feels doomed. The man I want is blowing cold air at me. McMurdo Valley is a paradise I can’t claim.
What’s the point in playing anything safe anymore? Soon, I’ll be back in Vegas, working for someone else, hoping again to find love.Might as well own my feelings right now.
“You make it seem like I bullied you into letting me come along.”
“I don’t think I said that at all,” Tommy claims and wipes mustard from his beard. “I think you just thought that’s what I said.”
“I’m not delusional.”
He cocks one of his blond brows and mutters, “I don’t know about that.”
“Is that a dig at how I thought my shop wouldn’t fail?”
“No, it’s a dig at how you keep getting yourself worked up whenever I come around. What do you think will happen?”
After a moment spent considering possible answers, I finally just say, “I’ll get to spend time with you.”
“And then what?”
“I’ll spend more time with you. That’s how it’ll go along until you blow me off. Then, I’ll return to Vegas.”
Tommy’s lips tighten. “You don’t look like someone from Vegas.”
“You mean fun?”
“No, I mean—” Tommy pauses and shrugs. “I don’t know what I mean. Well, maybe I did mean fun. You seem quiet and sad. But maybe Vegas will do that to a person.”
“It’s not the town. It’s just me.”
Tommy clenches his jaw and asks, “Why come here?”
“Years ago, I visited, only for a few hours. I thought this place was heaven on earth. I imagined I would find everything I needed here.”
“But that didn’t happen.”
“No,” I say and bite into the sandwich. “I think maybe I knew it wouldn’t work. I’m not stupid about business. Yet, everything I did here was wrong. I picked a bad location and serve items found at other places. Maybe I wanted to fail.”
Thinking back, I wonder if I was really stupid as much as self-sabotaging.
“I was smart enough to insist the realtor add an escape clause to the lease in case the business failed. That part, I got right. So, yes, I think I knew my dream was bound to fail.”
“Why coffee and cupcakes?”
“I don’t know. When I gave up my dream for a restaurant, I came up with the idea of a cozy shop. But there’s nothing special about coffee and cupcakes. Anyone could get those anywhere.”
