AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Then the realization hit, and color drained from his face, his blue eyes bright against pale skin as he opened the box to reveal a neat little recording device taped inside. Josh picked at the duct tape, pulling the device free and holding it in shaking hands. It was obvious he had questions, but nothing was coming out, and he was staring at the camera and then up to me, white as death.
“Take it.” I instructed, “Destroy it,” I walked to the door, taking my leave of this whole sorry deal.
“Wait,” I heard Josh call out after him, “Ethan?”
I paused in my tactical retreat, turning on my heel, my face blank of the emotions churning in my stomach, emotions I should never let out.
“You didn’t pay me to talk,” I bit out, staying in character, for what it was worth.
Josh stared at me in confusion. “I didn’t pay you to hand me a camera that filmed us fucking either.”
He had a point. I heard a thread of accusation in Josh, and then he sighed. What was it about this man and his thank-you that was causing me to throw months of work out of the window? I didn’t know what to say, my usual confidence destroyed by the stupid-ass morality that guided me now.
“They paid me to fuck you, film you, I got a conscience. That is all you need to know.” I explained, taking a step back towards the door. Josh stared at me, and I knew I wasn’t hiding my emotions as well as I’d hoped. Josh wasn’t stupid, he would see through anything he tried to say.
“Whopaid you?” Josh asked, his voice trembling. “Was it Charles Rouxier? He’s the one my ex-wife is marrying, he’s… there’s something wrong with him. Something evil, and no one else sees it but me and Ben. Oreo hates him.”
I didn’t know who Oreo was.
“Anonymous,” I said quickly—there was no way I was getting into a discussion about State Representative Rouxier. “Something about a custody battle.”
Josh shook his head. He had the weight of the world settling on him and was exhausted.
“I want full custody of my son. He’s nearly ten, with his mother most of the time, he’s… I see him holidays… odd weekends… ” I couldn’t help but feel the pain in each of Josh’s halting words. “Ben—that’s his name—he needs me… he… shit… last time he came home I saw bruises.” He stopped talking, fear flashing in his eyes that he’d maybe said too much, and instead I watched as Josh focused on the recording device containing his fall from grace. “I’ve been so careful, stayed so safe, but if they film this, what were they going to do? Blackmail me into backing off?”
I shrugged because he was too close with his observations. “It’s what they usually do.”
“‘They’?”
“Lawyers and shit.”
Josh appeared defeated. Then he pulled some strength from inside. A determination to fight and to not let this go.
“Do they pay you well?” Josh asked, and my heart shifted.
“They did.” I stood my ground even as Josh took a step towards me, anger in his stance, calm, his chest bare, each muscle defined more than I would’ve expected from an accountant. “You were a means to an end, but you said thank you,” I admitted.
“Hence the sudden conscience?” Josh asked.
I winced; there was nothing but derision in his voice as he took his hands from his pockets and curled them into fists at his sides.
“No. Fuck knows what caused that one. Your kid, the thank-you? I don’t know.” If I were to list more reasons, Josh’s blue eyes would be somewhere at the top. I shifted to one side as Josh reached past me and pushed the door shut, stiffening as I expected the first punch. I could take him down in one move, but maybe I deserved to be punched.
Maybe I deserved to be hit so hard that it made him feel better.
Instead, Josh moved back to the bed, turning his back to me and sighing, dropping his shoulders. I wasn’t stupid; because of me, Josh could have lost his son to his ex-wife and her politician husband-to-be on a more or less permanent basis. Josh had every right to be pissed, furious, disgusted, overwhelmed, but I assumed that he must still be riding the high of orgasm because he seemed exhausted. I wondered if Josh saw the sadness and regret in me at what I’d done.
“Why did I do this?” Josh murmured. I wasn’t sure Josh was talking to me. “Why, after all these years did I give in to what I really want? The night before the final hearing for God’s sake?”
“I don’t know—” I shrugged. I didn’t know what the hell was going on with any of this.
It shocked me when Josh sighed, turned to face me, and then extended his hand. “Josh Anderson.”
I hesitated; the decision I’d made was a little more complicated when it came to repercussions than handing over my name. To do that meant blowing a year of work, but there was something about Josh—a love for his son in the words he’d used that came over as vulnerable and defeated.
Whether I liked it or not my cover was blown. Danvers would be furious; my team would be shocked at the sudden turn of events.
I couldn’t sacrifice Josh on an altar of netting a clutch of crooked assholes, albeit drug and weapon-trafficking crooked assholes.
