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“Can I use your bathroom?” I ask and Merrick nods absently, setting up his easel and paints, putting his brushes where he can reach them easily.
I follow his directions and stare at myself in the bathroom mirror. My eyes are red and swollen and there are tear tracks on my pale cheeks.
I turn on the cool water and grab a cloth, attempting to put myself to rights. If there’s one thing I don’t want memorialized by Merrick, it’s pain. I’ve had enough of that looking in the mirror lately.
CHAPTER4
Merrick
It’s been three days since Onyx started sitting for me while I worked on her portrait and I still can’t figure out what I’m looking for in this painting. Every stroke of my brush brings some new facet of her red-gold curls out, one more color glittering in her bright aqua eyes, flecks of so many blues and greens that I can’t seem to find all of them.
She fidgets in the plush armchair that I have her leaning back into, her eyes on the ceiling. There’s something in her eyes that confounds me. I can’t figure out what the emotion is but it’s driving me crazy.
I slam the brush down. “Dammit!” Onyx jumps and her eyes dart down to mine before she looks away.
“What! What the hell is that look, Onyx? What are you thinking about?”
It’s driving me nuts. Like she’s deliberately hiding something from me and it’s killing me slowly, torturing me.
Her phone rings and her back straightens, her cheeks paling again. I throw the brush across the room. “We’re done for today!” I holler, knowing that I’m acting like an ass but unable to stop myself.
Her phone keeps ringing and I point at it. “Aren’t you going to get that?”
She shakes her head and sorrow creeps across her delicate features. “No. I’m not. I’ve got to go, Merrick.”
“I know. It’s late.” I don’t want her to leave. For some reason every day that she leaves it feels a little bit more like she’s taking pieces of me with her.
“No.” Her head shakes back and forth and an uneasy, sick feeling hits my belly.
“I mean….I have to leave early.”
“You have another two weeks left.” I say it like a dumbass. Like I’m not grasping what she’s saying.
But I am. We’ve been having fun. I make her laugh and she makes me so damn happy that I can’t bear to think of her leaving. I’ve pushed it out of my mind. But something has felt off all day today. A different look in her eyes and that’s what’s been baffling me, evading my every attempt to put it on paper.
Defeat. I’ve never seen it on her face and I don’t fucking like it.
“Why?” I ask her, fists clenched at my side.
“It doesn’t matter. I just have some things I need to take care of. I’m leaving tomorrow morning.”
I suck in a sharp breath and try not to let the stabbing pain that’s burning in my chest out. I want to howl with rage for some reason.
“I see.”
She shakes her red hair sadly. “I don’t think you do, Merrick. And I hope to god you never do.”
I move towards her, my steps quick and hard. “What the hell does that mean? Are you in some kind of trouble?”
A sob seems to startle her and she lifts her fingers to cover her lips. “Not in the way you mean.”
“Tell me, Onyx. I will help you.”
“Nobody can help me,” she sighs and turns away. I grasp her shoulders and turn her towards me.
“My brother is the fucking sheriff! I can help you! Just tell me what the hell is wrong!” My voice breaks on the last word. It’s all wrong. All of it. She shouldn’t look so sad and broken. She shouldn’t be this defeated. It’s not right.
Her head shakes again and a single crystal tear trails down her cheek, breaking me. I move closer to her and pull her into my arms, holding her tightly when her slender frame is wracked with heartbreaking sobs.
