AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“It hasn’t always been completely terrible. Weactuallysortadated for a while after I found out I was pregnant. He had apologized and said he’d try to be better,” she added, as if that made it all okay. “But … it’s never been particularly good either.”
Ragecouldbe powerful. It could be enough to make a man kill, and for the right reasons, I thought it could be justified. I could kill Seth, and I knew it would be justified. Maybe not in the eyes of the law, but I didn’t need it to be. Not when, in my heart and mind, I knew it would be right to rid the world of another vile man.
But I also knew I wouldn’t do it, as nice as it was to think about bashing his head against a brick wall. No, I wouldn’t do it because, for once, I felt I had too much to lose.
I reached out with a hand—so much bigger than hers—and laid it over her arm.
“Then,anythingwith him doesn’t count either,” I said in nearly a whisper.
She rewarded me with a smile, genuine and sweet, and I prayed if we ever found ourselves in bed together—if ever she was ready—it would count.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
SALVATION & REDEMPTION
“So, on a scale from one to ten, how much do you like it here?” Ray asked as we walked down Main Street after dinner.
My belly was stuffed, my heart was full, and my hand held tight to hers. Our difference in height, shown in the reflection of the shop and restaurant windows, was almost comical, and I had to stop myself from laughing a couple of times. And as funny as it was to see her—so small—next to a giant like me, it also felt good. To know I could be the power she’d been missing for so long. Herprotectorand strength.
“Oh, I’d give it a solid eleven.”
I glanced toward Patrick’s brother, Ryan Kinney, the local petgroomerand tattoo artist, walking across the street with his wife and their kids. The group of them could give the Addams Family a run for their money, yet nobody in town seemed to bat a lash.
I could relate.
The locals had been skeptical of my presence initially, and I couldn’t say I was friends with everyone—especially Mrs. Montgomery, the cranky old lady who liked to bust my balls at work whenever she tottered in. But now, I could walk around town withouta single oneof them staring warily, and I knew that came down to me and the solid reputation I had been building for myself.
It was a good feeling.
“Wow, an eleven, huh? That’s impressive.”
“Why? What about you?”
“Oh”—Ray wrapped her other arm around mine—“I wouldn’twannalive anywhere else—that’s for sure. And I love being at the library. Being surrounded by books is my happy place.”
I glanced at her with curiosity. “You know, I’ve never thought to ask what books you like to read. I’ve seen you read those mushy romance novels”—she poked at my side for teasing her, and I laughed, brushing her hand away—“but what else do you like?”
“Oh God, everything,” she answered, laughingeasilyand pulsing her hand around mine. “There’s nothing I don’t enjoy; I justhave tobe in the mood. Like, sometimes, I go on a crime thriller kick, and other times, I can’t get enough of horror. A few years ago, I couldn’t stop reading memoirs and travel journals. Like …” She laughed again, shaking her head. “I don’t even know why. I just couldn’t get enough of reading about places I’d never been to.”
“Well, that’s the cool thing about books, right? Like, you don’t have to leave the house to be transported somewhere else.” I smiled down at her, and although it felt a little sad, I hoped she couldn’t tell. “I mean, that’s why I started reading anyway.”
My mind traveled back to my life after the loss of both my grandparents. Poverty had been new andunfamiliar,a terrifying adventure I had never thought I’d ever have to embark on. On one horrible day, when Mom had forgotten to give me a few bucks for lunch, I’d sat in the cafeteria, hungry and angry and too ashamed to say anything to one of the teachers or lunch aids. I glanced at a kid I barely knew, saw him reading a book with a boy wizard wearing round glasses on the cover, and asked if it was any good. He insisted it was the greatest shit he’d ever read in his life, and I made the split decision to ditch the rest of my pointless lunch period to check outHarry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stonefrom the school library.
My tumble down the Hogwarts rabbit hole was swift and welcome, and a love for reading had been born. And believe me, the healthy escape was far more embraced than the hole in my belly, and it was one that I’d taken with me, clinging to every book I got my hands on like a poor man held tight to his last penny.
I couldn’t begin to imagine what my life would be like without books. Where would I be now had I not had those fictional friends to hold my hand and imagination captive? What would I have done differently if I’d always been fully submerged in the tumultuous, awful reality of my life?
“Why did I start reading?” Ray contemplated with a thoughtful hum, then sucked in a deep breath as we turned down the street leading to our community of tiny houses. “I think, at first, it was just the thrill of doing it. My sister is older—”
“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I interrupted, startled to learn something new about this woman I was certain I could no longer live without.
I’d always wanted a sibling. I had always wanted that sibling to be Billy if I could have my way. How different would my life have been if that had been the case? Would his mother have hated me so much, so effortlessly, now if she had been my mother too?
God, it was silly how easily the thought of Billy’s mom could make me want to cry.
I cleared my throat and blinked my eyes, focusing my attention on the pretty lady beside me.
“Yep. Just one. Stormy. She lives up in—”
