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I looked at my hands and saw he was right. “Sorry. I’m sorry, Noah…”
“No, no,” he said, taking one of my shaking hands. “Not gonna do that. No sorry, no bullshit. You thought about having to leave, right?”
I nodded, then swiped at a tear escaping my eye. “Yeah.”
“You’re not leaving, are you?”
“No, I mean, I don’t want to. That’s the point.”
“Then… don’t leave! Are you planning on hurting me in some way, cheating on me, or anything?”
I turned to stare at him like he’d lost his mind. “Never. I’m not a cheater.”
“Gonna… try to kill me or hurt my animals? Burn down my house on purpose?”
“Never! Noah, what the hell?”
“Then, I’m not kicking you out! If you did those things, sure, I’d boot your ass out of the gate. If not? Then, I told you, I am keeping you. This is home for you now. I see the way you look around, how you appreciate every inch of this place. You love the animals, and you even named the damn milk cow! I’ll bet you did that the first fucking day, when I made you milk her, didn’t you?”
A sob and laugh came out at once, but it was true. “Yeah.”
“Then shut the living fuck right up and let’s go buy you some dildos. Maybe you’ll feel more at home after you have a few dildos in the closet that I’ve shoved up your ass.”
The tears dried before they could ever leave my eyes and I barked a laugh that felt like the best laugh anyone could have. “You are sick in the head, you know that, right?”
“I’ve been told. You better?”
“That’s where we’re going shopping?”
“Hell, yes. The only reason I want to meet face to face with this fucker is so we can have an excuse to go to town and buy sex toys.”
My shaking stopped, and I actually calmed, and much faster than usual. Maybe it was the sex toys, or maybe it was just Noah, but I was getting better. I felt better. That was new to me, too. “Well, okay then. Let’s go to the city.”
We drove the opposite way that we usually took and made it to the main interstate in just under two hours. I had no idea the drive was so long, and when I mentioned it, Noah informed me we’d be staying in a motel that night.
“We are?”
“Long drive back. I have a friend coming to take care of the animals in the morning. I figured my best worker could use the night off and a little citified fun. What do you think?”
“I think I’ll miss the ranch, but I’d love to have a night on the town with you. You’re sneaky.”
“I can be, when I want to surprise someone. I packed us a little bag. It’s behind the seat. I don’t want you fretting on anything tonight. We’re gonna go to dinner, like a proper date, maybe go see a movie so I can fondle you in a dark theater.”
“You’re gonna get us arrested,” I quipped cheerfully. My panic was gone, and I felt on top of the world again. Noah was better than drugs.
“Well, I’ll be discreet. That’s all after we do a bit of shopping first, though.”
“For dildos,” I added.
“Those and whatever else looks fun to shove up your ass.”
My head fell back as I laughed. “The romance is overwhelming me.”
With a playful smirk, he teased, “Oh, I am a very complicated man, Eli. I can give you romance, but I also expect some sex too. I’m a real prick that way.”
“Oh, you expect sex for the dinner you’re buying me?”
“Damn straight. Or gay, as the case may be. Are you complaining?”
