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Her hazel eyes light up. “So, we’re having breakfast with KennaandDaddy?”
I smile. “If that’s okay.”
Maggie giggles and sits next to Eli, grabbing her fork as if she’s ready to eat right now.
The kids are so attached to Kenna already. I’d almost messed all of that up, and for what? A one-night stand with a woman nearly half my age?
I make each of the kids a plate and one for me and Kenna, too, and she comes down freshly showered and smelling like rosewater, her dirty blonde hair damp.
“It smells amazing, Derek,” she says as I sit at the end of the table.
The kids eat plenty and Kenna asks for seconds, and overall, we have a wonderful breakfast. Eli tells me all about how Kenna told him a story about trains that run on magic and Maggie corrects him twice and tells him they run onunicornmagic.
She’s wonderful with them. She talks with them and laughs with them and I would never have found a better nanny.
I just have to keep it together, and push down my jealousy about her new boyfriend. Even the thought of it makes me want to grit my teeth, so I try not to think about it.
I’m a simple man.
If it hurts, I won’t think about it. It’s easy.
But not thinking about it is kind of like not thinking about the elephant in the room, and when Maggie and Eli both pass out in a few hours after finishing the floor puzzle with Kenna, we find ourselves alone again.
I don’t quite know what to do with myself in social situations that aren’t work related.
“Do you want to keep receiving cash? Or I could talk to my accountant about direct deposit?” I mumble, and Kenna looks at me, confused.
“Oh, cash is fine,” she says back, blushing slightly. “You pay me too much, though.”
“I don’t pay you enough,” I shoot back.
Maggie snorts out a snore and Eli whines when she kicks him in the head.
“I should take them up to bed,” I say, laughing softly.
“I’ll take Eli, you take Maggie,” she says, and I nod.
I pick up my little girl and she tucks her head against my shoulder immediately. I’m filled suddenly with love for her and Eli, thinking that I never would have made it through Suzanna leaving if they weren’t with me.
I wish she was a better mother to them, but at the same time, I’m so glad they’re mine and mine alone that I can barely stand it.
They’re perfect, despite all their attitude problems now and again.
Kenna takes Eli up to his room and I take Maggie to hers, lying her down gently and kissing her forehead. She snores even louder on her back and I can’t help smiling as I tuck her in.
I meet Kenna in the hallway, and again, I don’t know what to say.
“Derek,” she says before I slip into my room just to get out of the situation.
“Yes?”
“Last night,” she starts.
I hold up a hand, planning to tell her it’s none of my business, that I’m sorry I pried, but she shakes her head, continuing.
“It’s not what you think,” is all she says, and then she disappears into her room.
I take in a deep breath. Living with Kenna after kissing her, touching her, being with her, is going to be a real challenge.
