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“Don’t know everything?” he finishes with a quirked brow. “Fuck that, I know the whole sordid story. You’re the one who knows fucking shit.”
I cross my arms over my chest, narrowing my eyes at him. “Fine—what don’t I know? I’m not sure there’s much that can top him being married this whole time.”
Jazz rolls his eyes, as though I’ve just said something completely ridiculous. “Look, I don’t know why he didn’t tell you about Natalia. Maybe it’s because you were only fucking for a few weeks and he wasn’t ready to share every single detail about his private life.”
I flinch at the sardonic tone and the way Jazz just reduced my relationship with Tanner to nothing more than casual sex.
“Or…” He sighs, his face softening for the first time since he stepped into my classroom. “Maybe you were his happy place and he didn’t want to tarnish that by mentioning her. Because, trust me, that bitch is fucking poison. Even when she’s not trying she’s still ruining things for him.”
I shake my head in confusion. “I still don’t understand. He’s the one who lied—”
Jazz runs a hand through his hair in obvious frustration. “Fuck, you’re not getting it—she’s a trigger, Deacon. And I know he told you all about that shit so don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.”
Fucking hell, I’m so confused. Clearly Tanner’s marriage isn’t a happy one, and I can understand why Jazz would be defending his father, but I still can’t help feeling betrayed. “Yeah, I do, but I still don’t—”
He fixes me with a hard glare. “Look, she is the devil. And I mean that literally. Like, theactualdevil.”
“I don’t think you know what the word ‘literally’ means,” I say dryly.
Jazz grunts in annoyance, shaking his head. “All Dad wants to do is forget she exists. Marrying her was the biggest mistake he ever made.” His features arrange into a thoughtful frown and he gives a little shrug. “Well, actually, right now he’d probably say not telling you about her was his biggest mistake. But if he’d never married her to begin with he wouldn’t have been keeping it from you, so…”
“But he did marry her,” I say quietly, feeling my gut clench with regret. Because the reality is, even if I can forgive Tanner—and let’s face it, I was pretty much there even before getting dressed down by his son—it’s not as though we can ever actually be together. “She does exist. Why hasn’t he just divorced her if he hates her so much? I asked him if he was planning to and he said no.
“Well if you’d given him more than two seconds to explain, you might have learned that she’s holding him to ransom until the terms of their pre-nup come into effect. She’s threatened to take Izzy if he tries it before they hit the ten year mark,” Jazz informs me, leaving me feeling as though the ground underneath my feet has suddenly shifted.
Why the hell didn’t I think of that? Tanner’s kids are the most important things in the world to him. He’d do absolutely anything for them…including staying in a marriage that made him miserable.
“Fuck,” I mutter, rubbing a hand over my face and stepping back a couple of steps so I can rest against the chalkboard.
“Bet you feel pretty shitty now,” Jazz says, practically crowing at the sight of my distress.
I glare at him. “Clearly you’ve never been heartbroken.”
He lets out a snort. “Fuck no. I don’t do any of that love and romance shit.”
“Color me surprised,” I say dryly.
“But let’s just clear one thing up—you broke your own heart, dude. Dad could have explained all of this if you’d given him a chance to. You could have spent the past few days fucking instead of moping around like pathetic idiots.”
I shake my head morosely, staring at the carpeted floor. I feel even more heartsick now than I did two days ago. At least then I could be angry. Now I’m just sad. I feel like I’ve been cheated out of something incredible. “It doesn’t change anything,” I mutter, letting out a heavy sigh. “It stings that he didn’t tell me, but I can understand why he wasn’t ready. But it doesn’t change the overall situation. He’s still married…”
Jazz scoffs. “Onpaper,sure. But they’ve been separated for years—something else he could have told you if you’d fucking asked.”
I rake a hand through my hair as regret consumes me. I thought I’d given Tanner enough of an opportunity to explain himself—if an explanation had been possible—but I realize now I didn’t. Not even close. I went over there feeling angry and confrontational, and when he confirmed Sullivan’s revelation about him being married, I completely shut down. It’s no wonder Tanner hadn’t been able to find the words to explain; especially if, as Jazz said, his ex is a trigger for his anxiety.
I’m finally able to tear my gaze from the floor and look at Jazz, offering a grateful smile. “Thank you for telling me all this.”
He shrugs. “Yeah, whatever. If you want to go apologize, you should wait ’til tomorrow morning. I’ve got Izzy at mine tomorrow and she’s going to stay the night so you’ll have plenty of time to fuck.”
Jesus Christ, does this guy’s brain-to-mouth filter ever turn on?
“Wow, that’s so sweet,” I say dryly.
“Sorry…make love,”he drawls in a sardonic tone. He turns for the door and then glances back at me. “Just try not to give the old man a heart attack. I know he’s in good shape but he’s still getting on in years.”
I roll my eyes. “I’ll be gentle.”
“Not too gentle, I hope.”
