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“I’ll be your happy place. Your haven. Your safe house. You can hide in me if you need to. But you don’t have to hidefromme. Nothing’s ever going to ruin this, Tanner. If you trust me, then you know I won’t let that happen. And if I know what’s going on in your head—what’s causing the tension you’re carrying around—then I’m going to know what you need to let go of it,” he says, lips spreading into a grin. “Like…do you just need a relaxing night with take-out and a movie? Or do you need a hot shower with me scrubbing your body down and swallowing your cock? Or…do you need me to fuck you so hard you can barely walk the next day?”
“Jesus, Deacon…” Unable to resist any longer, I reach for him, slipping my hands under his t-shirt and running them over his hard muscles.
He lets out a sharp breath and draws his forehead back, piercing me with an intense look. “Are you hearing what I’m saying?”
“You want to fuck me so hard I’ll barely be able to walk tomorrow,” I say with a smirk.
He lets out a soft chuckle. “Fucking needy bottom.” He drops his hands from my face and rests them at my hips instead. “Forget about my cock, I’m trying to make a big romantic speech.”
“You’re the one who brought your cock into the speech,” I remind him. “And I can never forget about it. It’s imprinted on me like a baby duck.”
He laughs, giving a wry shake of his head. Then his expression softens, his gaze gentle. “I need to know that you’re hearing what I’m saying to you.”
I gaze at him for a long moment, my heart swelling as I fully appreciate what he’s offering me. “I hear it.”
And then his lips are on mine. Fierce and hungry and hot. I sink into the kiss instantly, tugging him closer against me and groaning as our tongues clash together.
Fuck, I’ve missed this. I’m such an idiot for denying us this connection for so long. I should have taken every kiss Deacon was willing to give me; I won’t be making that mistake again.
Our lips finally tear apart and Deacon rests his forehead against mine again, his ragged breath hot on my face.
“Tanner…” he rasps out. “Fuck, I want you. It’s just…Jazz explained, but I need to hear it from you. Before…”
I know what he’s asking. He needs to make absolutely certain I’m not still involved with someone.
I lift a hand to gently stroke his hair. “If you ask the IRS, then, yes, I am married. But we’ve been separated for three years. I would love nothing more than to divorce her, but—”
“Jazz told me about Izzy,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry.”
I let out a sigh, relieved that I don’t have to go into the whole sage. Deacon and Jazz must have had quite the talk. “It’s not just Izzy I’m worried about though,” I admit in a near-whisper. “I honestly don’t think I could get through a trial. Even just the thought of it sends me spiraling.”
He draws back to gaze into my eyes again. “You don’t ever have to do it if you don’t want to. I’m good with living in sin,” he adds with a smirk. “But if you ever do decide to go through with it, I’ll be there with you. And if you spiral, I’ll just wind you back up again…or whatever the opposite of spiral is.”
I let out a soft chuckle, leaning forward to brush my lips to his. “I love you.” I feel like I’ve been keeping that thought to myself for a million years and now I can’t stop myself from bursting out with it. “I love you.” I say again. “I really love you.”
“You seemed a little surprised about this,” he says with a chuckle.
“Not surprised to be feeling it,” I tell him. “But I wasn’t planning to say it.”
He offers a sweet smile. “Well, I’m really glad you did.”
“And now you’re supposed to say…” I prod him.
“You’ll have to wait your turn, babe,” he tells me with a teasing smirk.
The back and forth ends when the soft kisses morph into desperate, hungry ones that make my head spin and completely steal my breath.
My hands can’t get enough of Deacon’s body, and soon enough his jacket and t-shirt are on the floor and I get to roam my fingers all over his heated skin and hard muscles.
Needing more of him, I tear at the front of his jeans and tug them down, my hands wrapping around his hard dick the moment it’s free. Fuck, I love the way it feels pulsing in my grip; and I love the groans Deacon lets out as I stroke him. It’s ridiculous to think how hesitant I used to be to touch him here. I was more than happy to have this cock fill my ass, but got forbid it touched me anywhere else.Idiot.
“Okay, nope. No, no,” Deacon cries, grabbing my wrists and pinning them against the wall.
“What—did I hurt you?” Shit, I’m still new to the whole jerking another guy off thing—what if I’ve caused him permanent damage?
“Fuck no,” he growls. “But if you keep your hands on me I’m going to blow before I can get inside you.”
“That never seems to matter whenI’mabout to come,” I point out. “Where’s it written that you’re allowed to tease me until I’m practically crying but I can’t even touch your dick?”
