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“You won’t, Serafina, but I assure you, I would be included. When someone spills and begins confessing, everyone diverts as much blame away from themselves as they can, and who do they do it on? Dead or excommunicated members. It's a common criminal tactic. Besides, I'm not even particularly innocent myself." I shrug.
"You're being selfish; you know that?"
"Says the girl who is obsessed with revenging a ten-year-old murderer. We’re all selfish, Serafina. Now, let's go back to bed. I'm tired, and it's still a long way till morning." I try to take her by the hand, but she retracts like she's being touched by a leper.
"I've gotten what I want, Ferro. Being in bed with you is completely useless to me now." She says with venom on her tongue. That does nothing but bring a smile to my face.
"Well, do it for fun, then. Take a break."
She shakes her head and wrinkles her face in disgust. “With a man that served the organization that caused me so much pain? Please.” She scoffs. “I’m trying to keep my dinner in my stomach as it is. Don’t make it any harder for me.”
That was rude.
“You can stay in the guest room, then.” I huff, feeling too tired to even argue with her. Ladies have said much worse things to me in the mafia house, so I'm too used to insults to even pick offense. Usually, though, the girls end their night with a sore neck from a choke hold or a sore core from me fucking away all the condescending things they have to say about me, but I let her go scot-free…this time. She’s been through a lot, and it'd be heinous of me to want to add to that.
Besides, who knows, she might genuinely be disgusted with me. Anyone will be if there's a possibility that I killed their father.
Chapter eight
Distractions
Focus
Working with Yelena is bitter-sweet, with a lot of emphases on the bitter. Only a psychopath like me manages to find the honeycomb of the tree bark. The sweet part of working with her is that she is very brutal in assigning work deadlines.'Writing a ten-page summary of a three-hundred-page case filing in three days'is light work for me now, and I love it.
See why I call myself a psychopath?
Other colleagues of mine don’t even envy the fact that I’m her most reliable worker. The work that comes with that kind of position is far too dreary for the prize of a few extra hundred dollars and minor tips here and there, but my reason for taking the challenge supersedes any of those reasons. The crazy work hassle keeps me busy.
…too busy to have my brain occupied with any other thing, which is fair game for me considering the fact that my tight schedule still affords me the time to investigate my father’s death. If I had any more time to myself, I'd probably spend it wallowing in the depression and self-guilt of it has been my fault that my father died only three years after my mom did…because that was my life before the job.
Thoughts and regrets
…, and it was painful.I lost friends…and didn't mind, my boyfriend took his time and was patient with me, but I proved time and again to him that I wasn't worth the wait, and I eventually liberated him from me in my third year of college when I finally came to terms with the fact that he was way too good for me. The job, when I got it, became my new boyfriend, and I showered it with as much love as I could because it gave me an escape from reality that no one person could ever, so, yes, find Yelena and her general treatment of me revolting, but I think I hate her less anytime she comes with a new task to assign me.
…until recently, when her work started to suck, mainly because it interfered with the time I had to think of some certain individual.
If I'm being honest, I started missing Ferro the very minute I left his presence at the library, but I'm not here out of the volition of my emotions. I'm here to get a job done, and I won't stop until it is complete, not even if my pelvis is practically tearing out itself in need of some‘Ferro-ing.' The first day away from the house didn’t seem so bad, mainly because I was still high on the resolve to‘not see him again’and that'he disgusts me,' but the more I go without him, the clearer it gets that Ferro might just be a part of my life that I need to at least tidy up before moving on, or it'll haunt me forever. I have to make an apology to him for crashing his party time and for the insult I gave him before I left. It was completely unnecessary.
‘Or you’re just looking for a way to see yourself back on his bed again.’My mind exposes my guilty pleasures outright, but I shake my head and shake it off.
“You know, I could really use those documents I asked you to fetch me some thirty minutes ago.” Yelena’s stringy voice jars through my thoughts and shocks me back to work.
“Yes, ma’am. I’ll get it to you before the hour runs out.” I begin speed typing on my computer, my head immediately coming to life with the words I need to have written down minutes ago.
This type of distraction is new.
"Time-constricting promise, but I'll honor it. See you in fifteen minutes." She struts out of my office with her long beautiful legs that I really envy. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that she has a part-time job somewhere as a model. Her entire form fits the job description. The Yelena I know, though, would probably consider that kind of job beneath her.
Anyways, did she just say fifteen minutes?! I had no idea the hour was that far gone. How I actually finish that document in the time frame is only what I call Angela magic. The rest of the week, however, just goes to show how much horrible it can get in my head if I crave someone. Maybe this is happening because I have starved myself of the pleasures of my flesh so much that when I finally get the opportunity to, it's all I can think about.
His beautifully sculpted, delicious looking…
“Stop it, Angela. You’re here to apologize.” I tell myself over and over again as I stand in front of his door. This shouldn’t be happening. I shouldn’t be feeling this way, but again, I can’t help it. Not in the slightest. I reach out my hands to knock, but I eventually don't need to because before I do, the door swings open, revealing the grumpy-faced handsome devil, whose green orbs brighten up once he sees me.
Chapter nine
Allured
