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“I can’t catch a fucking break,” I mumbled to no one. This was Cadence and Gracie’s first full day here. We had to have a serious talk but it could wait until later. I’d promised her peace and right now she was getting just that.
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The day was cool. Gracie was in the pool with Maddie until one. I’d only hired her for two hours which meant she would hit my pocket for the extra time but watching her with Gracie was well worth the money.
After Cadence finally dragged her daughter out the pool with the promise that she could swim the next day and show her mother how good a swimmer she was now there wasn’t much fight presented. She was exhausted anyway. The water was a natural sedative when it came to kids.
We had lunch together after Gracie decided on peanut butter and banana sandwiches which wasn’t my favorite but I ate two and didn’t complain. It made her happy and making her happy made me fucking ecstatic.
There were only two other highs that paralleled the satisfaction I received from being the reason for that beautiful smile on her tiny little face.
Producing the same effect for her mother and being on stage performing. Today had been perfect and had further convinced me that I needed to keep them both around.
And happy.
After lunch, Cadence gave Gracie a bath, changed her clothes, and we spent the rest of the afternoon exploring the property which was a tour of the small putting green, tennis courts, pond, gardens, and basketball courts. I also had a running trail that I used when I didn’t feel like hitting the treadmill.
By seven, Gracie could barely keep her eyes open and Cadence pulled her into her lap just to keep her awake long enough to eat her dinner. Another selection by Gracie but one I fucked with a little more than peanut butter and banana sandwiches, grilled cheese and tomato soup.
While she put Gracie to bed, I checked on Kaliq who was in my studio making beats which meant that he was in a better headspace. Maybe it was being home or possibly that he was no longer carrying as much weight anymore after coming clean about what truly happened the day of our mother’s accident but he seemed to be in good spirits.
Laughing, smiling, connected. I would never in my fucking life blame him for what happened to our mother. I mourned the loss, was angry that it happened, but I loved them both and knew that Kaliq would have never intentionally put her in harm’s way.
Things happened that we couldn’t predict or control. Her death just happened to be one of those things. We suffered losses and they hurt like hell but placing blame didn’t relive of us of the pain or hurt that lingered.
I had to move past it and I needed Kaliq to do the same. Today, for the first time since it happened, I believed he was making an effort to do so. It would take time, but seeing my brother happy, productive, and inspired gave me hope.
“You are my daughter’s new favorite person. I would be inclined to say that you now have the number one spot. I’m a close second but I’ve been demoted.”
I chuckled as she approached and flopped down in the space next to me on the sofa. She pulled her feet up and tucked them beneath her and leaned into my side. “Your house is so beautiful and peaceful. I could stay hidden away in here for weeks at a time and never leave.”
“You’re the only one preventing that from being your reality, Cadence. My offer stands.”
“Can we not?” she murmured. “Today was such a perfect day.”
Most of it.
“It was.” I leaned down and kissed the top of her head.
“Thank you for everything but you do know that every day can’t be like today or I’ll never get her out of here.”
“Maybe that’s my plan.” I brushed my fingers over her shoulder and then down her arm. She groaned in annoyance which was cute and proof that she damn sure wasn’t feeling the idea of me using manipulation as a tactic. I wanted them here. No, it didn’t make sense but life rarely did. We would figure it out.
“Kids need balance and boundaries, Jaah. If you give her everything she wants…”
“Then she’s a happy kid.” I cut off whatever she was going to say and gave her my thoughts which had narrowed eyes glaring my way.
“She’ll be spoiled kid who I won’t be able to do anything with.Balance and boundaries.”
“I can afford to do the things I’m doing so it’s no big deal.”
“It’s a big deal because this is temporary. When we go back to our lives and there are no more racks of bathing suits that magically showing up paired with swim lessons and chefs granting her wish when it comes to meal choices then I become the bad guy.”
And how many fucking times have I said this doesn’t have to be temporary.
I didn’t want to argue about insignificant things at the moment so I decided to choose my battles. Right now there was a much bigger one that needed to be addressed.
Once we crossed that bridge I would focus on giving her enough reasons to agree with my plan to keep them here.
