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Therage brewing fresh coats my tongue with acid.Memoriesrace through like a video sped up times fifty of all the girlsI’veseen flirt with him; my fists ache to pummel the shit out of something, anything to get this feeling out of my body and the thought ofAdrianout of my head.
“Yeah,”Igrit out as my knuckles pale strangling the steering wheel. “Sure.”
Hishand slips over my thigh and gently squeezes. “Justbe careful, okay?Idon’t want you to get hurt again, or… or worse.”
Iswallow any possible response and start the car before shifting into drive.
Theshort ride is silent and hot despite theACblowing at full blast.Adrian’shand stays firmly planted on my thigh, warming until skin sticks together.Monarchbutterflies smash and die all across the windshield and cover the car in greenish-yellow guts and pretty black and orange wings.
Iturn left into their driveway framed with brick columns and spindly trees on either side.Somethingglistens along the fence line to the left.
AshirtlessZak, completely covered in sweat and tattoos, works on mending the fence with gloved hands and pliers.
Mystomach drops so fast thatIheave.
Ipark in front of the door, hoping, praying he’s ignoring us and continuing work on the fence, and peek over at the entrance.
Zakis heading this way, determined.
Myheart stutters, both leaping and stopping at the sight of him.LaVirgencitaall in gray protects his heart and overlooks theAlamoacross his abdomen, a sight that would normally bring me to my knees.
But, now, it makes me lock the doors and cover my eyes soIcan’t see him.
Adrianflicks the lock and pushes his door open, standing halfway out the car. “Stayright there.”
“Steph, can we talk?”Zakhollers.
Mychest is wound so tight that each fiber of muscle tremors.Itake a deep breath. “Canyou tell him maybe later?Overthe phone?”Isay toDree. “Ican’t…Ican’t look at him right now.”
“Shesaid on the phone, later.”
Silence.
Dreesits in the car and takes my free hand, rubbing his thumb back and forth. “I’msorry.”
Mybreath is ragged asIstare at our hands.Zak’sstare crushes me like a boulder sitting on my chest;Adrian’spresence smothers me.
“Whydidn’t you ask me?”Iquestion softly.
Adriansniffs, watching his brother. “Gottongue-tied whenItried.”
“Soyou never thought to confess your feelings somehow?Dosomething beforeIcheated onZakwith you?”
Hescrubs a hand over his face. “Youmake me so fuckin’ stupidIcan’t see straight sometimes.”
Iwhisper so quietly thatI’mnot sureIsay anything at all. “Ihate you.”
“Yeah, well.Ihate you, too.”
Myhead snaps up. “Why?”Idemand in an offended tone.
“Younever saw how muchIloved you and never wanted me until you were high outta your mind.”Hepauses. “You’vefucked me up more than anyone.”
Tearsroll down my cheeks. “Fuckyou,Adrian.”
Hesmirks. “Youalready have.”
Isnort, smacking his arm before dashing the tears away.Butthe smile falls quicker than it appeared.
