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Sunnyis handsome even in death; his thick beard is well-groomed, and his long, dark hair streaked with gray frames his face and flows into a charcoal pinstripe suit, complete with a bolo tie.Hisgolden wedding ring glints under the chapel lights, like it’s been freshly polished and hasn't been through years of abuse on their ranch, three kids, and twenty-one years of wedded bliss.Heclasps a shiny black rosary in his hands.
AndLupe… she’s the most gorgeous woman inSanAntoniobesidesKris, even with pale terra-cotta flesh and sunken cheeks.Theypicked out her favorite red dress with a tasteful number of sequins, and her long dark hair is in a braided crown around her head.Thediamonds in her wedding ring glimmer without the herb remnants sticking out likeI’mused to seeing, and she grasps a matching black rosary in small hands.
Ican’t imagine a life without seeing either of them almost every timeIhang out with the twins or when we have a local show.Ihave no idea how their kids will handle it.
MomcoversLupe’shand with hers. “IpromiseI’llwatch over them,Lupe,” she whispers. “I’llwatch our kids when you can’t.”
Iturn to theRamossiblings, and when our eyes meet,Krisbegins to blubber all over again.Islip my arms around her shoulders and hug her tight. “I’mso sorry,” is allIcan manage.
Sheclings to me. “Theyloved you so much,Steph.”
Miniwaterfalls stream freely down my face, andIsqueeze her once more before stepping away.Shannontries to smile at me, but it ends up being a grimace.
Zakstands next to him and immediately reaches for me, burying his reddened face in my hair.Isniffle and kiss his head.
I’llbe strong for him.Somebodyhas to be for this big teddy bear.
Aftera long moment, he eases up, pressing his hot, tear-soaked cheek against mine as he whispers, “Ilove you.”
Mybreath catches in my throat, and what was icy cold in my body from the shock of death is warmed over by a red glow.Maybea funeral isn’t the best time to be told those three big words for the first time, but anything could happen at any given time.Freakaccidents could take away the chance before it happens.
IhugZakclose. “Ilove you, too, hon.I’llsee you after.”
WhenIstep over slightly in front ofAdrian, his eyes and cheeks are bone dry, brows knitted with a severe crease between them.He’sbeen so angry the past few months, and losing his parents to a drunk driver has only made him go silent.
Ireach out for him, anyway, enveloping him into a warm hug and holding him tighter than his siblings.
Slowly, the stiffness in his limbs loosens.
Gradually, his arms encircle my waist.
Closingmy eyes and raking my fingers through the dark hair at the nape of his neck,Isay softly, “I’msorry,Dree.”Iblink back more tears threatening to set themselves free at the thought of losing him. “Ilove you.”
Hisarms grip tighter.Hetrembles around me.
Aheartbreaking, harrowing sob shatters my eardrums.
“They’regone,”Adriancries against my shoulder.Hisvoice echoes throughout the church. “Oh,God, they’re really gone.”
Itry quietly shushing him, but his wails only grow louder. “Dree, c’mon,”Isay, grabbing his hands. “Let’sgo outside.”
ZakpatsAdrian’sshoulder a couple of times before he escapes the pew.Itake his hand, and he follows me outside to the prayer garden a few yards away where laVirgencitawatches over those who pause here to rest.
Adriantries to dry his cheeks, but his eyes have reddened and tears begin to fall again as he stares at me.
Myheart splinters.Hedoesn’t cry—not even when he laughs super hard.
“Dree, honey,”Imurmur, gently swiping at his cheeks.
Hislip trembles. “CanIhug you?”
Immediately,Ibring him close, chest pressing against his. “Ofcourse, hon.”
Adriansobs his heart out until my shoulder is damp and cold.Eventhen,Ihug him hard enough to maybe put all the pieces back together, at least for a little while.
Heinhales deeply, sniffling and groaning as he wipes his eyes.Igrab a new tissue from my purse and dab at his cheeks and nose.WhenIfinish,Igive him a small smile that he returns briefly.
“Steph,I…”Hetrails off, searching the brick beneath our feet.
