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That was it. No profiles, nothing on social media.
I’d never seen him before. I shouldn’t try to see him again. I was with Dexter, and boyfriend or no, Patrick was bad news. On a campus of 40,000 people, it would be easy to avoid him.
But that night, after Dexter finished, after he told me I was sooooo hot, rolled over, and fell asleep — after I’d pretended to finish too because it was easier than trying and failing while Dexter kept askingdoesn’t this feel good, isn’t that nice, baby, don’t you want me as much as I want you?— I touched myself to the thought of those cold blue eyes watching.
Those huge hands holding my ankles open.
That deep voice telling me I was going to come for him whether I liked it or not.
That I was his, helpless and excited, to do with as he pleased.
That I could never, ever lie to him, because he’d always know the truth.
And look, what a good girl, coming so hard and so out of control…
When my heartbeat slowed, I opened my free hand. Clutched in it was the cocktail napkin.
Shakily, I smoothed it out, tiptoed to my desk while Dexter slept, and hid the napkin inside.
I thought about Patrick, and I swore to stay away.
*****
“Christina!”
A voice broke in on my reverie. Allison waved at me from across the B-School lobby.
My study group was here.
Nate jogged over, begging to see my notes —because Christina always has her shit together —and Kyla wanted to know if I’d brought snacks as usual. Allison pulled off her gloves and asked if everyone had done the reading.
As we walked to the second-floor lounge, I took one last peek in my bag at the invitation for the Kappa Sig party.
“Plans for tonight?” Allison asked.
“We’ll see.” Pasting on a smile, I pushed the invitation to the bottom of my tote bag.
11 pm.
3
Money
Christina
The Kappa Sig house was packed. Music thumped, bodies crammed the dance floor, and people cheered the first round of parties of the new semester.
As more people — mostly girls — were let in the door, the temperature rose higher and higher.
Inside, I hugged my coat close. The January chill hadn’t left my body yet, and I refused to think about the cold, dark apartment that would be waiting for me tonight.
“Christina!” James Ulloa waved me over, a huge smile on his face. “You look amazing. I mean, you always look amazing.”
I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and he handed me a plastic cup of beer.
“You’re here by yourself?” His brow furrowed. “Where’s Sydney and everyone?”
“I needed to do my own thing tonight.”
